Tag Archives: The Undertaker

Apr 15

Wrestlemania XXX: Imagining What the Card Will Look Like

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“We support your local sports team” say the WWE – Photo from Wikimedia

With a very disappointing Wrestlemania XXIX in the books it’s time to look forward to what the big event will look like next year. For the past six years the company has been like Star Trek movies, brilliant showings for the even numbers, and dullsville for the odd ones. Hopefully next year things will continue, as the company is sure to go all out for the event next year in New Orleans.

There have already been rumours of a Brock-Rock showdown and every year there is some talk of Cena-Taker taking place, where would this leave the likes of CM Punk, Triple H, Daniel Bryan, or the star that seems to have been born in Fandango.

So with a little bit of speculation we get the following matches…

Tons of Funk, R-Truth, Santino Marella and Zack Ryder vs. Prime Time Players and 3MB
YouTube Pre-Show Match

This is sort of a thrown together 10 man tag to get people who would pop the crowd on the card. They could all dance around, hit their spots and move on.

Lights, fireworks, GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!!

Chris Jericho and Christian vs. Rhodes Scholars
WWE Tag Team Title Match

Of course this is dependent on Jericho returning, but a reunion run with Christian could be exciting. They could have a nice little run with the tag team titles and have a showdown with two of the best smarmy heels in the business. Hopefully a chance to open the big event is a big apology to the Rhodes Scholars for leaving them off the card like they did. It could be extra fun to get Edge in the corner of the blond Canadians as a nice little nod to the past.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

This match fits the “no idea what to do with these two guys on the card spot”. It’s safe to say that The Miz won’t be a face this time next year, since he’s been pretty flat in this role. He can go on and on about being undefeated at Wrestlemania and drop this match cleanly, possibly foreshadowing another first time loss at this big event…

Antonio Cesaro  vs. Wade Barrett vs. Fandango vs. Kofi Kingston 
 vs. Mark Henry vs. Kane vs. Big E. Langston vs. Justin Gabriel
Money in the Bank Match

The card this year really could have benefitted from bringing Money in the Bank back. It would be a fun match early in the card and it could get some big exposure for the mid-card names like Kingston and Cesaro. Besides the gimmick gets overdone with two a year. They could easily have a different event in July. This match could be hurt by big guys, but it could be fun to see them throw the little guys around. If Gabriel is not over enough they could replace him with a host of other talent, preferably on the face side of things.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio

Every year there is talk of a Cara-Mysterio match, but every year it doesn’t seem to work. Sin Cara does not seem to be working out in the WWE so the company strapped the rocket to Alberto in order to make a new Latin star. With Rey’s body breaking down, this could be a perfect chance to end his career on a high note in a great place. Plus they can finally do the mask record that they want, and have them all be for Rey as a sort of tribute.

Natalya vs. Charlotte
Diva’s Title Match

Charlotte is one of the bright spots in the NXT Divas Division and just so happens to be Ric Flair’s daughter. Natalya is the most talented, yet underutilized member of the Divas on the roster, and she just so happens to be a relative of Bret Hart. Wrestlemania X and XX had certain bursts of nostalgia so it seems reasonable that this could be an easy chance to have something similar happen here. If they had their Hall of Fame family members in their corners it could be pretty epic and actually make the ladies a draw at the big event.

CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler
World Title Match

Wrestlemania XX featured quite possibly the best triple threat match ever for the Big Gold belt contested between three of the top workers of the era. What better way to draw back to that then have three of the top wrestlers compete for the same belt? It doesn’t much matter who is the champ going in but Punk is the most established so we may as well have him as champ going in. We would all be able to sit back and enjoy the show.

Ryback vs. Big Show

The match that was long rumoured to happen at this years event. This match should be a quick squash to put over Ryback as a legit giant. It could be a nice quick cool down after the classic that we would see right before.

The Shield vs. Evolution

Yet another call back to Wrestlemania XX when the young upstarts took on some of the hugest names in the business. Now here is a chance for those former upstarts to be the big names and put over The Shield in a huge way. There have been rumours of a Batista return and this would be a great way to use him and Triple H, plus we could get an interesting dynamic with a potentially heelish Orton. Sure it’s not that different than the six man tag from this year, but it could still be a ton of fun.

The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

This match has been rumoured for a while now and it would be a huge celebrity match with the obvious twist that both celebrities are former WWE Champions. These two had an amazing match and feud in 2002, so they could easily draw on this as being “11 Years in the Making”. Of course The Rock was injured facing Cena, so he may be decapitated wrestling someone as stiff as Lesnar, but that’s a chance I sure am willing to take!

Hall of Fame ceremony featuring Macho Man Randy Savage and Owen Hart!

John Cena vs. The Undertaker
WWE Title vs. Streak

This is the last true dream match featuring WWE superstars, so you know it has to happen at Wrestlemania, somehow, someway. This could be an absolute gold mine for the company if they do it right. The most obvious question would be just how they would handle Taker. Could this be his last match? Would they let him retire as champion? Or could they have him win only for the Money in the Bank winner to cash in the next night or something of that sort. Or  heaven forbid they pull the trigger and end The Streak, giving that honour to Cena.

 

Sure 10 matches was too much this year as they whittled things down to 8 with one week to go. However, if they cancelled the Diddy Concert, took away one of Brock Lesnar’s 700 spine busters to Triple H, and canceled one of the videos hyping the show we were already watching they easily could have fit two more matches in with little problems. They had 10 matches at Wrestlemania XXVI and 11 at XXII, and both of those were fun shows.

Any ideas? Changes?

Apr 07

Wrestlemania XXIX: What SHOULD Happen vs. What WILL Happen

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“No More Than 17 Times a Lifetime…We Promise” – The far less popular tagline for this event. Photo from Wikimedia

So here we are the Granddaddy of Them All, The Showcase of the Immortals, the biggest event on the pseudo-sport calendar, Wrestlemania XXIX! The entire wrestling world is waiting with…indifference.

It’s easy to kind of see why the top three bouts feature two recent rematches and one match that seemed to be thrown together a few weeks ago with some offensive material thrown in for fun. But with some examination, this is kind of an interesting microcosm for the entire company.

On one hand we have heavily promoted matches featuring The Undertaker who is in his first match since last year, Triple H in his second match, and The Rock and Brock Lesnar who are both in their third matches since last years big event. Cena and Punk are the only real marquee draws just like last year. Clearly the company needs to build up some new stars.

However on the other hand, it looks like that’s just what they are doing. A remarkable ten wrestlers are in their first Wrestlemania, which is the most since Wrestlemania 2000, which featured a bunch of future World Champions in Edge, Christian, Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit, Eddie Guerrero  and Chris Jericho making their Wrestlemania debuts. Who knows in a few years we may be amazed that Ryback, Damien Sandow, and all three members of The Shield all had their first moments here at Wrestlemania XXIX. For all the doom and gloom about the over-reliance on part-timers there is a story to be made about the efforts to make some new big names. So even though this event seems blah now, it may in fact have a pretty big impact on the history of the sport.

Enough with the premable, let’s get to it!

Matches are in the order of what they SHOULD be. The numbers in brackets are the records of these performers at past Wrestlemanias.

YouTube Pre-Show
Wade Barrett (0-1) vs. The Miz (3-0)
Intercontiental Title Match


What SHOULD Happen: Is it possible to say put Cesaro in this match instead? The Miz had a nice little feud going for the US Title which never really got resolved, instead they have him start to feud with the other secondary champion who was feuding with Bo Dallas who hasn’t been seen in forever. Makes sense, right?  If they are really serious about The Miz’s face turn, which they should, then he should get the win and Barrett can start a real feud with a real main event player. Plus The Miz is undefeated at Wrestlemania, so why not keep it up? Hopefully they get 10 minutes or so to make it fun.

What WILL Happen: I don’t  think that the company cares, someone will flip a coin to determine the winner. Hey The Miz it is!

Match #1
Daniel Bryan (0-1) and Kane (6-8) vs. Dolph Ziggler (1-2) and Big E. Langston (0-0)
Tag Team Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: This is probably the best choice for an opener especially since Del Rio-Swagger will have a weird crowd reaction, Fandango is a wild card, and Ryback-Henry will probably be bad. Three of these four guys have a strong connection with the crowd and there has to be som excitement to see Langston debut, especially on such a huge stage. Hopefully we get a great 15-20 minute match with Ziggler and Bryan controlling most of the action. I think that it’s time for the amazing run of Team Hell No to end, we can have some slight miscommunication leading to the heels winning while the faces go back into therapy to recover from their loss.

What WILL Happen: It certainly won’t be 20 minutes, but this should be a fun match and I imagine Langston will come out looking like a star while Bryan and Kane explode at each other.

Match #2
Ryback (0-0) vs. Mark Henry (1-3)

What SHOULD Happen: Can you believe that Henry has only been in four Wrestlemania matches before this on and only one of those was a one-on-one match, against The Undertaker no less. Ryback makes his Wrestlemania debut and this match is really set up to give him a huge “Wrestlemania Moment”. This match should be short and end up with Henry getting marched around the ring and dropped down for the count.

What WILL Happen: Probably about the same as above, except it may be a little painfully long me thinks.

Match #3
Chris Jericho (4-7) vs. Fandango (0-0)

What SHOULD Happen: If given enough time these two could really deliver a flat out classic. Sure it may seem odd that Jericho came back to get stuck with a rookie, but we have to remember that Jericho gets to pretty much pick his spots. So the fact that Jericho picked the former Johnny Curtis says that he has high hopes for him, so the rookie gets his first big win and hopefully goes on to feud with The Miz over the Intercontinental Title.

What WILL Happen: Fandango will certainly get a win, I imagine there will be some sort of dance related shenanigans before hand.

Match #4
Sheamus (1-1), Randy Orton (4-5), and Big Show (4-8) vs. The Shield (0-0)

What SHOULD Happen: Every match that The Shield has been in has been quite good, and there’s no reason that this shouldn’t be as well, especially with the dysfunctional face team. There have been rumours of an Orton heel turn for a while now, I just hope it doesn’t happen here. There has to be a temptation to put Orton in The Shield, which would really derail the group. We should have Orton and Big Show argue most of the match and almost come to blow before Sheamus pulls them apart. Eventually Sheamus accidentally hits Orton with a Brogue Kick and The Shield go out and win. Over the course of the next few weeks or months the tension builds and we get a nice little Sheamus-Orton feud.

What WILL Happen: Orton turns heel in the match and joins The Shield as their leader.

Diddy Performs

What SHOULD Happen: Right after the song finishes out comes 3MB and thanks Diddy for being their opening act. They start to get in his face and look like they are going to attack him when Kingston and Truth run out to make the save, giving some people in the midcard something to do. Maybe they could even set up a tag team match with Diddy as a corner man at Extreme Rules.

What WILL Happen: He performs, he leaves, not much else happens.

Match #5
Alberto Del Rio (0-1) vs. Jack Swagger (2-0)

What SHOULD Happen: How the mighty have fallen haven’t they? This feud started out hot with some intrigue but has fizzled very quickly, really hurting Del Rio as a face. However, this match really isn’t in doubt is it? You can’t have the racist win the epic showdown, unless it’s Triple H, and it’s ten years ago. Del Rio should win pretty cleanly with an arm-breaker “injuring” Swagger for a convenient 30 days, standing triumphant.

UNTIL….Ziggler and Langston run down deliver a beatdown and we get the first man to ever win two different titles at the same Wrestlemania!

What WILL Happen: Del Rio will win and cleanly, they can’t be that stupid…can they?

Match #6
Triple H (7-9) vs. Brock Lesnar (1-1)
No Holds Barred Match
Triple H Must Retire if he Loses

What SHOULD Happen: The booking here is quite simple. Shawn Michaels hits an errant superkick, and F-5 later and one of the greatest of all time is forced to retire. Shawn and H can both do a special “comeback” next year in both of their last matches for reals.

What WILL Happen: This is probably the hardest match to predict what will happen. On one hand logic dictates HHH gets his win back but on the other hand do they really want their huge signing to go 1-2 in his first year? Especially since Lesnar reportedly resigned for another two years so he’s clearly on the up. Let’s go with the guy who owns the company getting the win.

Match #7
Brodus Clay (0-0), Tensai (1-1), and the Funkadactyls (0-0) vs.
Damien Sandow(0-0), Cody Rhodes (1-2), and the Bellas (0-1)

What SHOULD Happen: The Rhodes Scholars are so above this, let’s have them get the win in the bathroom break match. Let’s have Kaitlyn get invovled somehow since that was a potentially intriguing story that was completely forgotten about.

What WILL Happen: One of the biggest rules of Wrestlemania is: when in doubt, pick the face. So let’s have Team Funk get the win. 

Match #8
The Undertaker (Seriously, you don’t know?) vs. CM Punk (3-3)

What SHOULD Happen: As much as I’d love to see Punk go down as The Streak Breaker, it just doesn’t make any sense. He’s going down but damn it’ll be a really fun match.

What WILL Happen: See above, easily the most predictable match we’ll get.

Match #9
The Rock (5-4) vs. John Cena (6-3)
WWE Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: Get comfortable this may take a while…

The two have a back and forth match where Cena just can’t keep The Rock down for three. After a while out comes none other than Paul Heyman who distracts the ref and The Rock when out comes Brock Lesnar who proceeds to F-5 the pants out of The Rock allowing Cena to get the win. In an homage to 12 years ago, he shakes hands with Paul Heyman to end the show.

The next night Heyman kicks Punk out of his crew and Cena and Lesnar deliver a beat down, allowing him to take some time off and return in a few months as a face. This will set up Rock-Brock for next year, Punk-Cena at Summerslam, and probably a lot more.

What WILL Happen: No way we’re seeing a Cena heel turn. He’s clearly getting his win back.

 

So despite a pretty predicable card on paper, we have some intriguing questions. Will we see Triple H wrestle again? Will The Shield stay strong? Will they finally pull the trigger on Ziggler? How exactly will Cena get his win back?

Mar 03

Seriously, What’s the Plan for Wrestlemania XXIX?

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After watching the WWE product in recent weeks, I can’t help but feel like the WWE has the card written down on a napkin somewhere and it must read something like this:

Cena and Triple H need some big wins back

Undertaker wins if he wants to

Hey let’s make fun of the Tea Party and make a Mexican the Champion

Figure the rest out later

 

As it stands right now we are five weeks away from Wrestlemania and only two matches are booked. Clearly, Triple H-Lesnar in the rematch nobody asked for will be made official this week, and it’s highly likely that The Undertaker will challenge CM Punk, especially after Punk called himself God last week. That brings us to four matches that should be official by this time next week.

That in and of itself may not sound too bad, there is time to flesh out the card after all of these stories take care of themselves. The problem though, everything else is kind of a mess is it not?

Let’s see we have a multi-month feud between Cesaro and The Miz that seems to have ended only for The Miz to confront The Big Show, only for The Big Show to somehow get involved with The Shield. Speaking of The Shield, they continue their feud with Ryback, Sheamus gets added into the mix and so do Orton and Jericho, but then so does The Big Show. Sheamus, not content to feud with only three men, makes an alliance with Orton to fight The Shield and meanwhile is verbally sparing with Wade Barrett, not over his title but instead over Collin Ferrell. What happened to Bo Dallas by the way? Mark Henry squashes people left, right, and centre with the only The Great Khali standing up to him for some reason. Oh and the most promising surefire main eventer, Dolph Ziggler, loses again and again with no real direction. But hey, at least that’s better than Kofi Kingston who get saved by Truth to maybe set up a reunion for their team as they take on the Rhodes Scholars but that gets forgotten and Cody ends up maybe setting up a relationship with Kaitlyn the Diva’s Champion who really has nothing to do here. The only guys outside the main event with any real direction are the Tag Team Champions who will either finally have a match at the big event or possibly have to defend their titles with their torsos tied behind their backs.

Add in the fact that apparently the company is rumoured to have Sheamus-Barrett and Jericho-Henry on the show and it’s hard not to scratch your head. Sure they started to hint at Sheamus-Barrett last week but Chris Jericho and Mark Henry haven’t been in the same place, outside of the Elimination Chamber, in a pretty damn long time. Sure it would be a fun match, but it doesn’t exactly fit the story.

Pardon the pessimism, but it’s hard to care about the big event when the company clearly doesn’t. Of course the four surefire matches carry some intrigue, and it’s hard not to be excited about the possible Kane-Bryan match, but what about the rest? Wrestlemania is the chance for the future stars of the company to get some big time attention and be able to become main eventers in the future. It sort of boggles the mind.

So let’s say that those two matches do in fact happen, that gives us six matches with a lot of talent not booked, throw in Kane-Bryan and we’re up to seven. We would still need to get The Shield, Ryback, Big Show, Miz, Orton, Cesaro, Rhodes Scholars, Kofi Kingston and R-Truth, and the entire Divas division on the show. To make it worse, in the past several years Wrestlemania has tended to top out at eight matches, while having up to ten once in recent years.

So do they do The Shield vs. Ryback, Orton and Big Show as one match and the ten millionth Cesaro vs. Miz encounter in the other? That seems like the most likely option, maybe to add a mixed tag with Kaitlyn on one side and The Rhodes Scholars on the other, which should bring us up to ten matches to make it look like this:

The Rocks vs. John Cena – WWE Title Match

Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger – World Title Match

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar

The Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Mark Henry vs. Chris Jericho

Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus – Intercontinental Title Match

The Shield vs. Ryback, Randy Orton, and The Big Show

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz – United States Title Match

Rhodes Scholars and Tamina vs. Kofi Kingston, R-Truth and Kaitlyn –    **Possibly with the Tag and Divas Titles on the Line

 

Does that seem like it’s worth the money to you? What about Ziggler?

Feb 14

Wrestlemania XXIX: Another Idiot’s View of How the Card is Shaping Up

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Apparently they build stadiums on state borders… – photo courtesy of Wikimedia

Now that the Rumble is in the past and the Elimination Chamber is just a bit ahead it’s becoming that time when we start to get really hyped up for Wrestlemania! It seems like Rock and Cena are set to do battle, but what about everyone else on the roster? CM Punk has to fit somewhere, and so does Dolph Ziggler and his briefcase. Add in the fact that the WWE has debuted a lot of talent in the past year and the usual part-timers like Undertaker and Triple H need a seat at the table and we could have ourselves a packed card.

The last few years we’ve had eight matches on the big card but that included the ridiculous 14 man GM battle last year. Unless we get a huge match we may see the number of matches climb, so like our look ahead back in November — wait, we had The Shield facing those shmucks? — we have 10 matches on the docket and it includes a few multi-man affairs, but nothing as crowded as last year.

29 Man Last Chance Battle Royal

YouTube Pre-Show

Yes, this is a copy-paste from last time, but it just makes sense.  The winner of this Battle Royal gets a spot on the main card as the final member of the multi-man Intercontinental Title Match that we’ll talk about in a few paragraphs. Let’s have the winner be Bo Dallas to further his underdog story.

Fireworks! Explosions! God Bless America!

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Who is the Tag Team Champions?
Special Guest Referee: Dr. Shelby

After spending the past few months building up the Tag Team Division, the company sure has torn it down, haven’t they? The Rhodes Scholars go the way of Kingston and Truth, Rey and Cara are MIA, The Shield are focused elsewhere, and every other team is treated like a joke. The money is in a singles match between these two and it would be kind of fun to have them do a match to determine the Tag Team Champions, sure it was lame when WCW did it 15 years ago, but so was everything in WCW then. Plus if both men find a partner they could feud for the title for a few months afterwards.

Wade Barrett vs. Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth vs. Jack Swagger vs.
Christian vs. Mark Henry vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Sin Cara

Gauntlet Match for the Intercontinental Title

Apparently the company is considering making the Intercontinental Title the focus of Main Event and what better way to kick that off than to give it some focus on the big show? Instead of just doing a ladder match, which nobody would be opposed to, we could do a gauntlet match or something else like that. We could have Dallas pin Barrett and then he himself loses so we can transition the title away from that feud. We could also get a tease of Rey-Cara, which the company has put the nix on apparently. I’d have either Mark Henry or Christian get the big win here, but any one of them would be fine choices for champion.

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz
Flag Match for the United States Title

These two have a decent feud going and hopefully they can have them last until the big event to give us a good mid-card Wrestlemania moment. Making it a Flag Match seems like a logical blow-off to Cesaro being an anti-American US Champion so let’s go with that. Once The Miz wins he can transition the title to the pro-American heel Jack Swagger in a few months while Cesaro moves up to the top talent and works his way to hold one of the top titles within a year.

Ryback, Sheamus, Randy Orton, and Kofi Kingston vs. Brad Maddox and The Shield
Eight Man No DQ Match

I know that this isn’t that different than the match going on this Sunday, but hopefully The Shield can stay strong at the Elimination Chamber. Not to give too much away for the SHOULD vs. WOULD this weekend, but the match is totally set up to have a new member of The Shield, either Brad Maddox or a new guy like Conor O’Brian. As much as we would all love a War Games match, let’s settle for a No DQ Match where Ryback can finally get his comeuppance on The Shield.

Kaityln vs. Tamina
Lumberjill Match for the Diva’s Title

There needs to be at least on Diva’s match on the card so let’s go with the only two that anyone can name. We need a cooler match, especially after what should be a huge, crazy war. Let’s get this out of the way and maybe they can finally bring some of those talented women in NXT after Wrestlemania.

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar

We all know that this is going to happen, maybe there will be some sort of stipulation related to Paul Heyman taking control of the company attached in here. Either way, we can only hope that Lesnar goes 2-0 against Triple H here.

Wrestlemania Dance-Off!!!
Featuring Brodus Clay, Tensai, Fandango, Santino Marella, Zack Ryder, 3MB, and a few legends

Ok this isn’t a match, but it could be pretty entertaining and a decent cool-down segment after that last big match and before the other three huge matches on the card.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Chris Jericho vs. The Big Show
World Title Match

More spoilers for the COULD vs. WOULD but a multi-man match for the Big Gold Belt could just be in the cards. A simple Ziggler cash in coupled with a Jericho Chamber win could set up this very fun encounter. All four men deserve high profile matches and this is a great way to merge the two storylines and feuds. The ground work was already laid on Main Event this week as Alberto had a confrontation with Jericho and then a match with Ziggler. Hopefully Ziggler can walk in and out of Wrestlemania with the belt to look like a world beater.

BookDust vs. Rhodes Scholars

Sure the Rhodes Scholars “broke up” but we could get a great reunion match especially after the great Cody-Goldust segment in the Rumble and Cody calling out Booker T last week, we could get this as a short, fun comedy/nostalgia match.

The Undertaker vs. CM Punk

This match has been rumoured for a few months now and it could be an absolute classic. With the other two high profile matches being reruns, this could get some great fresh eyes on the product. Of course The Streak should continue, but this could be highly compelling.

The Rock vs. John Cena
WWE Title Match

This match is happening, we all know it. Their encounter last year was a ton of fun, and the rematch should have some added heat to it. As entertaining as a triple threat with Punk would be, this is where we are almost certainly heading so we may as well enjoy it.

 

Obviously the card is subject to change in the next month and a half.

Feb 01

Weekly Plus Minus: Rumble Fall-out, Dominant Sharks, Nail Fails (or does he?) and More!

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What a week it was! Since the last retrospective we had our first new WWE Champion since November 2011, a 19 year old phenom raked through the coals, and our favourite goalie in the world troll us with his excellent play. Oh so much to discuss!

Hit My Banner!

Weekly Plus Minus Logo

 

 

Plus Thumbnail

Predictable Booking: Most of the Royal Rumble went as we said it would happen, and you know, that’s not really a bad thing. Rock-Cena II is the money match, with an outside chance of a Triple Threat involving Punk, and the best way to do that was to have Punk drop the title and have Cena win the Rumble, otherwise it would just feel a little forced.

Before anyone complains about the predictability, remember all the times when the WWE swerved us for the sake of swerving us? Remember when Batista won the WWE Title back in 2009 only to have him drop it due to injury the next night and get it back to Orton through BS reasons? We should be glad that the WWE didn’t do something weird like that with having someone else win the Rumble and give us the most predictable Elimination Chamber match in history.

Add in the fact that we got the “shocking” reveal that The Shield and Brad Maddox are in cahoots with Punk and Heyman. This gives us a potential Dangerous Alliance 2.0 which also includes Brock Lesnar. If the strong booking of The Shield continues, then we have some real potential for the rookies to be elevated like few have been in recent memory.

If anyone is complaining about the straight forward story progression, remember the Road to Wrestlemania is just getting started, there will surely be some bumps and detours.

However, not everything predictable has been good this week..
Minus ThumbnailPredictable Deadlines: Was anyone in the world not surprised when Greg Jameson missed his deadline to secure money to purchase the Phoenix Coyotes?

Things are quite bleak for a franchise that has been through some very rough times over the past several years. It’s hard not to feel bad for Coyotes fans today…yes, we’re sure that they do exist.

Now hockey fans in the Seattle area on the other hand should be thrilled.

Plus ThumbnailTrolluongo: It’s almost as if Roberto Luongo figures out how people in Vancouver want him to play, and he goes out and does the opposite.

They want him to pitch a shutout, he goes out and shits the bed in front of Patrice Bergeron and Tyler Seguin just to see what would happen. They want him to be terrible so everyone can feel good about Cory Schneider and what does he do? Play lights out, earning a shutout in his most recent game and earning the nod against the hated Blackhawks and the Canucks fans are cheering for him.

Sure he’s increasing his trade value, but it’s also incredibly distracting for the Canucks and their always reasonable fans. It’s actually getting hilarious to watch.

Minus Thumbnail

Break in the Streak?: Recent rumblings have Undertaker’s status for Wrestlemania in doubt which could lead to the first Wrestlemania in 13 years and only the third since they started having double digits to not feature The Dead Man.

Of course this shouldn’t be too surprising consider The Undertaker’s age and already limited schedule, but it sure is not good news. One could easily argue that The Undertaker has been involved in the best match in each of the past six Wrestlemanias, going all the way back to his war with Batista at Wrestlemania XXIII and to not have a dependable, high quality contest and if the rumours of CM Punk being this years streak victim are to be believed, then we could just well be robbed of something great.

Plus ThumbnailJaws has Nothing on These Sharks: One of the biggest surprises so far this season has been the insane start of the San Jose Sharks who have roared out to a 7-0 start. All of this on the heels of them being finally discounted by hockey pundits everywhere (maybe even here too…).

For this teams entire history there has been one pretty clear pattern. Whenever people count them out they are at their best. When people expect good things out of them, down they go.

So it’s clear, we should never believe in them, then they will be dominante. Which will most certainly make people start to believe in them again, which will make them choke, which will make everyone doubt them, which will…

Minus ThumbnailFails Against Nail: Last week we ignored the entire Nail Yakupov celebration hooplah, hoping instead it would go away. Yet here we are.

A nineteen-year old scores his first big goal and celebrates and everyone nearly crucifies him. A few days later he scores another huge goal and does a very subdued celebration with his teammates and everyone is still all over him.

Make no mistake, this is about one very clear thing, the country he is from. Don’t believe me? Wait until Nate McKinnon gets his first big goal for the Columbus Blue Jackets or Calgary Flames and see what the reaction is.

 

Prediction for the Week: Luongo gets pulled in the Chicago game and everyone goes back to hating him.

Jan 12

Top 10 Likely Royal Rumble Winners

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With TLC out of the way, we’re now officially kicking the build to the Royal Rumble into high gear, which means one thing. We’re closer to the Road to Wrestlemania!

The recent winners of the most entertaining match of each year has been interesting to say the least. The last ten Rumble Winners have included: A Warrior, an animal, a viper, a metaphorical deadman, a wrestler paying tribute to his actual dead friend, one man we never talk about, two superstars returning from injury, and two guys in their first year of the company. Six of these ten men would win the world title at Wrestlemania, with the other four holding the gold sometime within the following year.

We haven’t had a repeat winner since Steve Austin won his third back in 2001 but with John Cena and Sheamus penciled in as challengers in many fantasy cards, this could be the year that gets broken. However, with two world titles and a huge glut of young talent, we could see someone surprise us. In this post we’ll countdown the most likely rumble winners and examine where that would leave them on the card for the big event.

#10
The Shield

Alright so this one is a bit of a cop-out but it could work. We haven’t had a co-winner since the very odd 1994 Rumble and this would put the trio over strong and hard. It’s simple, have them successfully play the numbers game and finish the Rumble as the last three members. They can jump out together at the same time and demand that they all get the shot at one of the champions to get us a fatal four-way against one of the champions who they decimate at Wrestlemania. It’s almost certainly not going to happen, but it would be pretty amazing if it did.

Likelihood of Happening: Are there pigs flying yet?
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: Randy Orton, Ryback

#9
Daniel Bryan

Easily the most surprising superstar for the WWE this year. He’s made the most out of losing the World Title in 18 seconds and being stuck in a tired “whacky tag team partners” gimmick. If anyone deserves their moment in the sun, it’s almost certainly him. He’s probably going to have a match against Kane at Wresltmania, which would not be for any title. However, if the company really wanted to give a match for the Smarks they could let him challenge CM Punk again or perhaps a rematch from last year.

Likelihood of Happening: It’s just too Indie-riffic to happen…
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: CM Punk, Sheamus

#8
Chris Jericho

If Edge and Cena have taught us anything it’s that the company loves to throw curve balls every so often. Apparently, Jericho has been in negotiation about coming back for a Wrestlemania match, and this would be a great way to make it high profile. He should have won last year, so why not have him get the W this time around? He could either have a rematch with Punk or he could get some revenge on the man who kicked him out of the company.

Likelihood of Happening: As likely as him not winning last year was…oh wait…
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: CM Punk, Dolph Ziggler, Alberto Del Rio

#7
Dolph Ziggler

Speaking of the Showoff, he doesn’t have the worst chance of winning the Rumble. He is primed to finally win the big one and what better way to start that march to glory than to have him win the Rumble? They only thing that’s potentially holding him back is the one thing pushing him foreword, that briefcase. It feels redundant to give him two title shots, but there is a chance to do something cool there. Imagine him challenging a face like Sheamus for the Big Gold Belt, and have him beat the Irishman down with a chair and get DQed only to cash in right after. If that isn’t a #HeelWrestlemaniMoment I don’t know what is!

Likelihood of Happening: Pretty darn slim
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: Sheamus, Randy Orton, Alberto Del Rio

#6
Brock Lesnar

How would this be for a man’s third return in a year? This event will be the ten year anniversary of his Rumble victory so why not have him do it again? Imagine Heyman gloating about this for the next several months. Especially if we get the chance of having him manage both World Champions. He’s been a rumoured opponent for The Rock at Wrestlemania, and it would be even huger if it was for the title.

Likelihood of Happening: Brock would most certainly flake out between winning the Rumble at Wrestlemania.
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: The Rock,

#5
Randy Orton

Sure he’s injured at the moment, but it would be a nice return to have him knock out all three members of The Shield before winning the big match and moving on to try and reclaim the Big Gold Belt? He’s been kept away from the world title for a suspiciously long time, sure he’s spent long periods of the year suspended or injured, but that hasn’t stopped the company from pushing him before.

Likelihood of Happening: Likely if a brisk wind didn’t injure him walking down to the ring
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: Big Show, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler, Alberto Del Rio

#4
The Undertaker

Triple H did say that the Dead Man is coming back, wouldn’t this be a nice way to do the return? A match between Punk and Taker has been rumoured for a while now so why not make it for the WWE Title? Sure it may not put over some younger talent, but it’s cool to think about.

Likelihood of Happening: I’d pay to see this, just to watch the internet explode when Taker eliminates Daniel Bryan.
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: CM Punk, Sheamus, Randy Orton, The Rock

#3
Ryback

He’s scheduled to lose his fourth straight high profile match on January 7th, so why not have him throw a million people out of the Rumble and go on to finally kiss the brass at Wrestlemania XXIX? He could get his big rematch against CM Punk, have an Unstoppable Force vs. Immovable Object match against Big Show or do some sort of Face vs. Face Match against any of the other big names. He’s probably the most compelling potential winner, no matter if it will happen or not.

Likelihood of Happening: Feed Me Something More Likely
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: CM Punk, Big Show, Sheamus, John Cena

#2
Sheamus

 He’s been highly rumoured as a winner and it totally makes sense. He’s always in the World Title hunt and it makes sense to get him back there. However it doesn’t make sense to give him his ten thousandth match against Big Show or Alberto. So it’s more likely that if he wins they will hot shot the title to either Randy Orton at the Elimination Chamber or have him chase Ziggler after he cashes in the briefcase.

Likelihood of Happening: The luck of the Irish may just shine on him…
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: Randy Orton, Dolph Ziggler

#1
John Cena

Look into your heart, you know it to be true. With the Cena-Rock rematch essentially set in stone for Wrestlemania, the obvious path is well…obvious. Rock beats Punk, Cena wins the Rumble, match announced the next night on Raw. TA DA! Sure they could hold off the title change until the Chamber, but a Cena Rumble win does the same. Add in the fact that only Hogan, Michaels and Austin have won two Rumbles, and it probably makes more sense to put Cena in that category than Sheamus does it not? Plus the internet would explode and that’s kind of great.

Likelihood of Happening: You can’t see him not winning, right?
Possible Wrestlemania Title Match: The Rock, The Rock, or maybe The Rock

Nov 24

Wrestlmania XXIX: Another Idiots Attempt to Predict the Card

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The big event comes to the New York area for the 37th time in 29 years! – photo courtesy of wikimedia

Now that Survivor Series has come and gone, we wrestling fans find ourselves looking in one obvious direction: Wrestlemania. Rumours have really started to kick into overdrive as questions have started to be fly. Will CM Punk still be WWE Champion? How will part-time performers like Triple H, Brock Lesnar, and The Undertaker be involved? Will Dolph Ziggler have cashed in his briefcase by then? How about rising stars like Ryback, or the newly debuted NXT Trio?

In this post, I’ll try to answer those questions as well as speculate on a few key matches. In a few months, once the card actually starts to shape up, we can look back and see just how wrong I was.

 

29 Man Last Chance Battle Royal

YouTube Pre-Show

These YouTube Pre-Shows seem to be here to stay, and there is no reason to think that they won’t try something big this year. The one thing I’m not certain about is if they even have 29 spare roster members to put in this match, if not it can be a smaller amount of competitors. The winner of this Battle Royal gets a spot on the main card as the 8th member of the Money in the Bank match. Let’s have a returning Christian win, but if he’s not up for it then the winner should be R-Truth or Brodus Clay with an outside chance of Evan Bourne if he’s ready.

Fireworks! Explosions! God Bless America!

Ryback vs. Big Show

On paper this may seem like a dull match to have jerk the curtain, but if you think about it, it makes perfect sense. The Big Show is a recognizable name to the casual fans that only watch Wrestlemania and Ryback is a name that the WWE clearly wants to be recognizable. Get them out both out there right away to get people paying attention and excited. Better still, have Ryback beat the Big Show quickly. Make the match less than five minutes long, including 500-pound Shell Shock to give Ryback a true Wrestlemania moment.

Wade Barrett vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Damien Sandow
vs. The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro vs. Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Money in the Bank Ladder Match

That’s right, this is the year that the Money in the Bank Ladder Match comes back to Wrestlemania! Apparently the Money in the Bank was a plan in the works for last year, but Wade Barrett’s injury made them reschedule. So let’s assume that Barrett’s recovery leads to their original plan this should be a go. While the field is very heel heavy, it makes sense given the landscape of the company at the moment. I ranked the competitors in order of likeliness of victory, with Barrett being the obvious front-runner and Cody Rhodes as a likely second option, assuming he recovers from his injury.

Rey Mysterio vs. Sin Cara

The only thing standing in the way of this match is the injury bug. This is a total dream match, and is clearly the end point of their current foray into the tag team division. Apparently the company is interested in breaking the record for most masks worn at the same time, so it’s quite logical that these two would need to fight to give a great shot of everyone wearing the masks, and having everyone put the mask on would be a great cool down after the chaos of Money in the Bank. Now if the company wants to have the masks be split among the crowd, it makes sense to keep this a face vs. face match, especially since neither wrestler would make a great heel. If they want to add some more motivation they could give either wrestler one of the secondary titles, preferably the Intercontinental strap, but it’s not really necessary. Expect Sin Cara to come out on top in this match no matter the title or face/heel dynamics.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Special Guest Referee: Charlie Sheen

There’s not doubt that this match is somewhere on the company’s horizons, it’s just a question of how soon will it happen. To me, they are at the perfect time to set it for Wrestlemania. Have them drop the tag titles in the next month, accidentally eliminate each other from the Royal Rumble, both compete in the Elimination Chamber which leads to a full blown break-up and here we are. Having Charlie Sheen involved may be a bit of a reach for this event, but it makes a lot of sense since the whole “Anger Management” thing was how this partnership started and Sheen was supposed to appear at Summerlam but they couldn’t get a deal done. Celebrities always play a role at Wrestlemania, so it’s obvious that he would come back. Whoever is the face in this match (probably Bryan) would be the logical winner here.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

World Title Match

These three men have been doing the lion share of work on the Blue Brand for a while now and should all be rewarded with a big high-profile match. Add in the fact that they all have a clear chemistry with one another and this match should be great. Ziggler walking in as champion, after the Money in the Bank cash in, makes the most sense, but if he still had the briefcase there could be an interesting side story as well. There have been rumblings of both Orton and Ziggler turning heel and face respectively, so that could very easily play into the build if need be. The winner really depends on where they want to go with any of the three being totally acceptable. I’d vote for a Ziggler win to really help establish him as a top level talent.

Eve vs. AJ

Diva’s Title Match

There’s got to be a Diva’s match on the card, and this is the only one of any interest left to do, is it not? Trish Stratus, Lita, and Mickie James: you are surely missed! I guess AJ should get her first taste of Diva’s gold in as much of a Wrestlemania moment that we can get.

Triple H (w/ Shawn Michaels) vs. Brock Lesnar (w/ Paul Heyman)

This match is pretty much set now isn’t it? Not really sure what the point of bringing in Lesnar to have him feud with Triple H and John Cena was, but surely there was some logic there. Their Summerslam match was quite good and the rematch should be equal to the task. Add Shawn Michaels as a corner man and the inevitable Sweet Chin Music on Heyman and it could be even better. If Lesnar is leaving the company then he would leave on his back, again, but if he is sticking around then there is the chance for him to pull out a big win in order to further some other feud.

Seth Rolins and Dean Ambrose vs. Team CoBro
vs. Justin Gabriel and Tyson Kidd vs. Prime Time Players

WWE Tag Team Title Match 

This assumes that the NXT trio that attacked Ryback are here to stay, and will function as a tag team. This group, potentially called The Shield could benefit from a Wrestlemania match and with the renewed focus on the Tag Team Division, a good spotlight match could be just what the doctor ordered. In my mind The Shield has the tag team titles by this point, and is able to defend them under Free Bird Rules.  The young trio could greatly benefit from walking in and out of the big event with the belts, even if the match would no doubt be cut short as a bit of a bathroom break/cool down affair.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Once in a lifetime, eh?

Since the company has all but decided on doing Rock-Punk at the Rumble, that leaves the rematch as the main option for The Great One. Their match at Wrestlemania XXVIII was fantastic, and there’s no reason to think that the second one won’t exceed it. Obviously Cena gets the win back, much to the chagrin of 70,000 New Yorkers.

Hall of Fame Spiel featuring Mick Foley and Randy Savage!!!


CM Punk vs. The Undertaker
WWE Title vs. Streak

That’s right, this is pretty much the only match that can go on after Rock-Cena. With two of the top matches scheduled to be rematches, it’s exciting to have a fresh attraction. Sure they faced off in two pretty terrible matches back in 2009, but post-pipe-bomb Punk is very different, and well this is Taker at Wrestlemania.

Oddly, the Streak has gotten to the point where being a Streak Victim really helps in the long term. I mean, think of the recent additions to the list: Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Edge, Batista, Randy Orton, Ric Flair, The Big Show, Kane. These are all surefire Hall of Famers, sure Mark Henry and A-Train were omitted  but they can’t all be great. To have Punk added to that very exciting list is nothing short of amazing.

Besides, it’s a great way to get the title off of him after over a year holding it. They can easily do a tournament or whatever right after Wrestlemania when Taker leaves again, or better yet have Wade Barrett or Cody Rhodes cash in the next night on RAW, that would be pretty amazing too.

So there we have it, ten matches, which may be a lot, but it is certainly doable. The last time the company had a ten match Wrestlemania it was Wrestlemania XXVI, and that had some nice long matches, so the company can balance it out again, no thirty minute epics like we had last year, but several matches in the 12-20 minute range and we should be fine.

Obviously, the card is subject to change over the next four months…

Jun 01

Weekly Plus/Minus: RAW is Show, Wrestlemania XXIX, Lidstrom Retires, Still no Plan B for the Coyotes

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Wow, what a crazy week it’s been! The Stanley Cup Final gets underway, while Wrestlemania XXIX starts to get planned. But you know what there is no plan for? The Phoenix Coyotes! 

So much to talk about, only one thing needs to be said…

Hit my banner!

 

Eighteen Year Monkey Off the Back: Unless you are from Manhattan, how could you not have cheered last Friday?

Despite being more successful in recent history, the Devils have long been in the shadows of the Rangers. This seems to have been made oddly emphatic since the 1994 Conference finals, when the Rangers defeated the Devils.

Even though since that goal Stephan Matteau scored, the Devils have won three Stanley Cups and made one other trek to the finals, they still don’t have the same cache as the Rangers. This seems to be complicated by the fact that the Rangers seem to so frequently get the better of their cross-river rivals in the Spring.

Yet somehow this Friday when Adam Henrique channeled his inner Martin Gelinas, that all changed. David was able to slay goliath, just  for one night. How could you not love that?

Plus it stopped us from getting a New York City Stanley Cup and Super Bowl sweep…although technically teams that play in New Jersey can do that this year.

60 Days for Idiocy: Just when you think Randy Orton has grown up, word comes out that he was given his second Wellness Violation, and will be suspended for the next sixty days. His next Wellness Violation will lead to his termination, per company policy. Orton was also suspended for behavioural issues a few years back.

This is clearly disasterous for the company that is already spreading it’s top names too thing. The slack will need to be picked up by the likes of Cena, Punk and Sheamus. While The Miz and Dolph Ziggler had feuds teased with the Viper this past week, and now will need to find a new opponent.

To make things worse, he will miss the 1000th RAW in July, which is slated to be in his hometown of St. Louis.

You stay classy, Mr. Orton.

Goodbye to a Legend: Arguably the greatest defenseman of a generation announced that he will hang up his skates. After 20 season, 4 Stanley Cups, and 7 Norris Trophies, Nicklas Lidstrom is set to retire at the age of 42.

Even if you are one of the many Red Wings haters out there, it’s hard not to have the utmost respect for their captain. He has been an absolute model for class and consistency over the past two decades. One has to wonder exactly how the Red Wings will replace this hugely important member of their blueline, and how much Ryan Sutter will ask to fill those skates.

Ratings Nightmare: This past edition of Monday Night RAW gave the lowest rating of the year, coming in at an abysmal 2.7.

This has reportedly lead to a mass panic backstage at the WWE. Apparently the CM Punk-Daniel Bryan match lost viewers, which could lead to some pretty disastrous consequences for us fans of workrate. Add in the fact that this was the first Monday night to not include John Cena in a very long time, and it’s pretty clear what is going to happen going forward.

While blame will be thrown at the likes of Brodus Clay, Big Show, Daniel Bryan, or Alberto Del Rio, the fact remains that the WWE has done a terrible job building any new stars in a very, very long time. The fact remains that Cena is 35 years old now, and can’t have much more than 2-3 years left of his current work load. Somebody needs to both step up individually and be given the support from the company to do so. Punk was close last year, but the company dropped the ball huge with his return and non-feud with Kevin Nash. Hopefully they can do something to ensure that this doesn’t happen with anyone else.


Lesnar vs. Taker: Apparently the plan in the works is to have Brock Lesnar challenge The Undertaker at Wrestlemania XXIX. This obviously plays off their infamous face-off from a few years ago, and can even go back to Lesnar’s feud with Taker in his first run with the company.

Obviously a match like this will give the company a massive pay day, but more importantly it gives us the chance to have John Cean defeat The Rock in a rematch at the big event, which would most certainly be the other side of this exciting coin.

Ohh and we could get Cena-Taker at Wrestlemania XXX, what’s not to love about that speculation?

No Plan B? In his “State of the NHL” Address before Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals, Gary Bettman once again address the Phoenix Coyotes. He stated that the NHL is committed to the Jameson group, but as of right now there is no Plan B. So neither finding another buyer or relocation has been considered.

This is either a straight face lie, or flat out idiocy. There are so many problems with the proposal for Jameson to buy the Coyotes, that certainly a snag will be hit somewhere. Something is going to happen where the NHL will be forced to own the team again, or the team will end up in Quebec, where they should have been years ago.

 

Prediction for this Week: The Stanley Cup Final is 3-1 for the Kings after four games.

Mar 31

Wrestlemania XXIX: Predicting the Card a Year in Advance

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Sure Wrestlemania XXVIII is tomorrow, but what about the event after that? Will they announce a Main Event a year early again? Will the Rock show up? What about CM Punk? How about The Streak, is tomorrow truly going to be the end of an era?

This post features a look at nine potential matches for the event next year, sure it’s early and about a zillion things can change between now and then, but it’s fun to consider, isn’t it?

 

Rey Mysterio and Sin Cara (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio and Christian
WWE Tag Team Title Match

It’s sort of a shame that Rey and Cara didn’t get to have a match at this years Wrestlemania. With both due to return soon, it seems likely that they may just have their big match by Summerslam. After that feud is done, it seems like there is a ton of money that could be made in marketing those two as a tag team. This could help since both of these wrestlers seem injury prone, so maybe their shelf lives could be extended with the two being put together.

Christian and Alberto don’t necessarily have a ton of storyline reasons to be together at this point, but they would make a great team in the Jerishow or Awesome Truth variety, and be logical opponents for Rey and Cara.

Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

Of course, these two are both heels at this point, but there have been rumblings about having either guy turn face for a while, and really why not? All of the best rising stars in the company are heels, so it seems like someone will need to turn face in order to break through, much like Sheamus did this past summer. My money would be on having Ziggler turn, but it could just as easily be Miz. An extended feud between these two could be a ton of fun, and could really go a long way to elevating both men to the top of the card where they clearly belong.

CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan

You want to talk about best in the world? We need this match in one way or another, and why not put it on at Wrestlemania? When Bryan first announced that he would cash in at Wrestlemania, this was the only match I wanted to see. But of course plans changed and here we are. These two would put on an absolute clinic in the ring and there an extended feud here would be nothing short of spectacular.

Chris Jericho vs. The Undertaker

This match has been discussed for the last few Wrestlemanias. If this match is really going to happen, it had best happen soon. Jericho is one of the few big names that hasn’t been added to The Streak, and it’ll be incredibly fresh. Given Jericho’s history with both HHH and HBK, he could easily slide into that storyline, which has been running since Wrestlemania XXIV, seamlessly.

United States Title Defended in a Battle Royal!
featuring: Santino Marella, Lord Tensai, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Big Show, Jack Swagger, Drew McIntyre, Hunico, Epico, Primo, Drew McIntyre, David Otunga, Mark Henry, The Great Khali, Jinder Mahal, and More!

This match is quite obviously filler, but it would be fun filler if nothing else. I love the idea of Santino Marella holding pulling a Honka-Meter of some sort and being forced to defend the title against everyone in a battle royal. It would be a great way to get some legends involved in a bit of an Old vs. New Type Match.

HBK vs. Triple H

As I said yesterday, I can’t help but think that we are going to get a Wrestlemania Match here between these two. It seems like HBK is going to cost HHH the match (probably innocently) and have it go from there. This could very well be announced as early as April 2.

Kharma, Kane and Big Show vs. Kelly Kelly, Brodus Clay and Zack Ryder
Mixed Tag Team Match

This is most certainly filler. I’d love to see Show turn heel, align with Kane and go on a rampage with Kharma. The face team was chosen just to have them all come out to Clay’s intro, what’s not to love about that?

Randy Orton (c) vs. Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus vs. Cody Rhodes
World Heavyweight Title Match

This could very easily be split into two separate matches, but we haven’t had a good multi-man match at Wrestlemania in a while, so why the heck not? This year will oddly be Randy Orton’s third straight year out of the title picture at Wrestlemania. He has been stellar in the ring this year, and flat out deserves to be closer to the top of the card. All other three men could help make this a great title match, especially since two of them have yet to hold the title, but I imagine that will change soon.

John Cena (c) vs. The Rock
WWE Title Match

Why the hell not?
I have a feeling that Cena will win this match, then they can set up a rematch for Summerslam, only for The Rock to win, leaving this to be a rubber match. To make it a title match could really add to the hype, as that was teased by Cena last spring but quickly forgotten once Punk burst onto the scene. We may as well make the big match even bigger, right?
I think having The Rock somehow win the title at Rumble or Elimination Chamber could make this even cooler, but I’m not certain that things will go that way.
Mar 30

Wrestlemania XXVIII Predictions

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John Cena faces the Rock in a generational showdown in two days. Triple H and The Undertaker will “End an Era” in two days. CM Punk and Chris Jericho will determine the best in the world in two days.

Wrestlemania is in two days.

To say I’m excited would be an absolute understatement.

As we’ve looked at in the analysis of different Wrestlemania Trilogies, this will mark the beginning of a new age. Will it be Cena Striking Back? Will it be the Era of Punk? The Return of The Rock? So many possibilities!

As a slight aside before we get to the predictions, we’ll be taking a week long break here. I’m going to be heading to Thailand tonight and will have to put the last six posts in the 40 Blogs in 40 Days series after. Sure it’s a little cheap, but it’s the best I can do. Also, I may have to wait and watch Wrestlemania after I get back and I don’t want to talk about anything else until then.

Now without further ado, the OFFICIAL Blade Jobs of Steel predictions for Wrestlemania XXVIII, with match order included. for fun.

Pre-Match Battle Royal: Brodus Clay wins by last eliminating Hunico and Epico to set off Wrestlemania size Funkfest.

Fireworks!!! GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!

CM Punk (c) vs. Chris Jericho
WWE Title Match

This has been rumoured to be the opening match; while that may rub a few people the wrong way, it’s probably for the best. This does need to be seperated from Cena-Rock and Triple H-Taker. Also, since it will probably be the best technical match, it sets the bar very high for everyone else to try and set.

Punk should walk away the winner here, but I don’t see it being fully decisive, maybe with a quick roll up or something like that. There is a ton of mileage left in this feud and a clean GTS/Anaconda Vice finish wouldn’t exactly make people shell out for the rematch.

Prediction: CM Punk via roll-up

Fantasy Booking Time: Ref bump, Jericho hits Punk with the belt or a chair, gets a bottle of whiskey out and pours it down Punk’s throat. Punk spits it in Jericho’s face and gets a quick roll-up as the ref wakes up, one-two-three!

Cody Rhodes (c) vs. Big Show
Intercontinental Title Match

After hearing rumours of Big Show vs. Shaq and Cody vs. Golddust, it was easy to be a little disappointed when this match was announced. But the build has been nothing short of fantastic. Cody has played the absolute perfect heel here, and it’s very obvious that he has an insanely bright future ahead of him. Show is of course on the downhill of his career and is great for putting over talent now. That makes the outcome of this match pretty set. What’s curious is just how clean the finish is going to be here, there is nobody set to interfere, no obvious foreign object — like Cody’s mask was last year — it seems like it could just be man-o a man-o and I doubt that Show will lose cleanly.

Prediction: Cody Rhodes hits the Beautiful Disaster after a low blow.

Fantasy Booking Time: Big Show gets to be involved in some sort of “Wrestlemania Moment” maybe he goes through the announce table which gives Cody a chance to gloat. He sets Cody up for the Choke Slam later but then Cody kicks him in the junk and hits his finish move to win the thing.

Santino Marella, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Zack Ryder, The Great Khali, Booker T
vs.
David Otunga, Mark Henry, Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, The Miz, Drew McIntyre
GM vs. GM Battle

This match could be obvious filler, but it could also be a great, fast-paced affair. Most of the guys in this match can flat out deliver, and if they keep the likes of David Otunga, and The Great Khali to a minimum we could just have a great match on our hands.

The obvious money is in Team Johnny winning. A heel authority figure seems to do better than a face one in the long term. Plus, Johnny’s team is just flat out better, featuring four former world champions. The tough call though is who gets the pinfall for the team? Storyline wise, Drew McIntyre may be the best choice given just how long his feud with Teddy Long has gone on, but The Miz would make a ton of sense too. The darkhorse, which I’m going to take her is Ziggler getting the pinfall. By all accounts he is ready for Prime Time, and I wouldn’t be shocked to see him drafted to Smackdown and get a summertime feud with Sheamus over the Big Gold Belt (oops should have said Spoiler Alert in there somewhere).

Prediction: Dolph Ziggler pins Booker T after Vickie pulls a distraction

Fantasy Booking Time:  After a finisher buffet, where everyone hits everyone else with their big moves, Vickie interferes and allows Ziggler to pin Booker. This sets off a little feud between Booker T and the Zig Zag Man that can cover the next few months as Ziggler gets ready to challenge for the World Heavyweight Championship.

Ohh and when Christian returns he gets his title shot that comes with a Team Johnny win against the very man who (storyline) injured him…

Hall of Fame intro and old guys wave

Randy Orton vs. Kane

This just reeks of Batista vs. Umaga from Wrestlemania XXIV, no real build, no real feud, just an excuse to get some main event talent in a singles match, and it will no doubt be forgotten shortly afterwards.

If anything can be learned from that match it’s this: when in doubt, go with the face and/or the bigger name.

Prediction: Randy Orton via RKO

Fantasy Booking Time: Nothing much to add here. Orton wins, moves up the card, possible feud with Daniel Bryan or a returning Alberto Del Rio.

The Undertaker vs. Triple H
Hell in a Cell Match
Special Guest Referee: Shawn Michaels

This match really is fascinating. Clearly they won’t waste The Undertaker’s streak on a semi-retired performer, would they? But what about Shawn Michaels? How on earth will he call it?

It really depends on if Shawn Michaels intends to step back into the ring or not. If he does, then the finish is pretty obvious isn’t it? He screws over Triple H. But what drama is there with him calling it down the middle? Maybe he makes an honest mistake or a longer slow count, I don’t know. But I have a feeling that HBK wants to step back in the ring against Triple H one last time…

Prediction: The Undertaker after a Tombstone

Fantasy Booking Time: HBK makes an honest mistake that leads to Taker getting the win, Triple H freaks out and lays him out the next night on Raw, challenging him to a match at Wrestlemania XXIX.

Kelly Kelly and Maria Menounos vs. Beth Phoenix and Eve

With all of the potential matches for Diva’s, this is the best they could come up with? It’s a little sad, but I guess such is the state of Diva’s Wrestling. I imagine that Kelly may have to start the match alone with Maria’s injury, only for her to run out, make the save and get the win.

Prediction: Maria pins Eve.

Fantasy Booking Time: Not much! Maybe have Kharma come out after the match and level Kelly Kelly and Maria, joining Beth as a team of Super Divas for the next few months.

Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Sheamus
World Heavyweight Title Match

This match seems likely for these Semi-Main Event spot. These two can put on a great match that gets the crowd energized without fully burning them out. The feud between these two has been very underwhelming, but the match should be great. Both guys can flat out go and I love the idea of them competing for the top prize a  year after being bumped from the card.

Prediction: Sheamus hits a Brogue kick for the clean win

Fantasy Booking Time: Hopefully these guys are given more than the Cena-JBL treatment. I would like to see them get at least 15 minutes to show their stuff, and hopefully Daniel Bryan doesn’t end up looking like a chump the whole time.

John Cena vs. The Rock

What else can be said about this match? It’s Icon vs. Icon, Generation vs. Generation. The match is going to be nothing short of a classic. The outcome is really rather obvious here, but it’s interesting to consider what will happen going forward.

Apparently the Rock is considering returning for another match at Wrestlemania XXIX, but who would it be against? A rematch against Cena, a one-on-one with CM Punk, The Miz? Someone else? It’s hard to say exactly, but it’s damn intriguing to consider. Either way, Cena needs to win cleanly here.

Prediction: John Cena after the third Attitude Adjustment

Fantasy Booking Time: Clean as a whistle, no shenanigans whatsoever.