May 19

WWE Extreme Rules: What SHOULD Happen vs. What WILL Happen

Posted on May 19, 2013 by G

Brought to you by Instagram apparently…

Welcome back to our monthly look at the big WWE Events. This month we get the former Backlash as Extreme Rules rolls around. In the past, this card tended to feature a series of Wrestlemania rematches. This year we get three, although there were only supposed to be two, so we can give them a bit of a pass on that.

This card has been built around the Steel Cage match between Brock Lesnar and Triple H, as well as the WWE Title Match between John Cena and Ryback. If we can think back a scant 8 months ago, Ryback looked like he was all set to be a huge face for the company and they even hot-shotted him into a title match with CM Punk. Yet somehow or another, he has yet to win a PPV Match against any regular WWE talent, even his match against Mark Henry, which seemed like it was custom made for him to win. His heel turn has yet to really and truly take off, so it seems unlikely that they’ll give him the win, but that didn’t stop them from giving the title to JBL almost ten years ago, and that one turned out just fine…

Enough with the preamble, let’s get to it. As always, matches are in the order that they should occur.

YouTube Pre-Show Match
The Miz vs. Cody Rhodes

What SHOUD Happen: This match was clearly just thrown together with little to no reason. Wasn’t The Miz feuding with Wade Barrett? Anyway, there is some potential here, but it is a bit of a stretch to bare with me. The Miz is rolling along just fine ready to win and Damien Sandow runs in to give Cody the win. The Rhodes Scholars continue to torment The Miz in the coming weeks. Miz searches for a partner to take these guys out, trying people like Zack Ryder or Justin Gabriel to no avail. Finally in a month or so, he find the perfect partner to take them on: John Morrison!

What WILL Happen: The Miz returns from an injury that nobody knew he had and Cody seems to be treading water, expect The Miz to win this one.

Match #1
Randy Orton vs. The Big Show
Extreme Rules Match

What SHOULD Happen: Man is Randy Orton ever boring! This feud does nothing to me, but they are both big names and fighting in a match that shares its namesake with the event, so it’s most likely to jerk the curtain here. There have been rumours of an Orton heel turn for months so let’s have that plan start here. Big Show gets extra ruthless and wins after choke-slamming Orton off the stage, or something else equally sadistic. After taking a few weeks off Orton returns with more of a killer instinct and starts to return to his heelish ways before finally snapping on someone, like say Sheamus to kick off a later feud.

What WILL Happen: Randy Orton is the master of filler PPV Matches, just ask Alberto Del Rio. Orton will win this one and fairly cleanly too.

Match #2
Kofi Kingston vs. Dean Ambrose
United States Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: This is one of the most predictable matches on the card. Ambrose wins this one, and hopefully cleanly. After the match, let’s have Reigns and Rollins come out to try and give Kofi a beatdown only for team Hell No to come ut and chase them back through the crowd.

What WILL Happen: Ambrose will probably win after some kind of cheating.

Impromptu Match/Segment #1

What SHOULD Happen: As The Shield celebrate their first title win, Teddy Long comes up to them and says that if Ambrose gets involved in the tag title match alter that he will be stripped of his newly won US Title. The three members of The Shield remain remarkably calm with that…

What WILL Happen: John Cena makes poop jokes about Ryback.

Match #3
Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger
I Quit Match

What SHOULD Happen: Really, is there anything other than an Alberto win that can happen here? Swagger really needs to serve his 30 day suspension, and this is the perfect time to do it. Have him locked in that cross-arm breaker until he quits and his “injured” for a while. Right after Alberto wins, we can even have Ziggler and Langston come and deliver a beatdown to both Alberto and Rodriguez, leaving people to wonder if Ziggler was faking it or not.

What WILL Happen: Del Rio will win, he has to right?

Match #4
Sheamus vs. Mark Henry
Strap Match

What SHOULD Happen: This match sort of depends on what the long term direction is for both main belts. It looked for a while like we were going to get a Cena-Henry feud, and we still may. However, Sheamus is a logical challenger for Ziggler. However, Ziggler seems to have plans for the immediate future, so let’s go with Henry getting the win to get him into a feud for the WWE Title soon enough.

What WILL Happen: This is similar to Orton-Show, and when in doubt with this company, go for the face or the bigger name. So expect Sheamus to get the W here, especially since Henry stood tall on Monday. Expect Sheamus to reenter the World Heavyweight Title scene soon.

Match #5
Chris Jericho vs. Fandango

What SHOULD Happen: First off, this match should be given a gimmick, but that doesn’t seem to have happened. Fandango should look strong here and get a cleanish win. Hopefully he can recapture some of the excitement that surrounded him only a month ago.

What WILL Happen: Fandango will probably win, but I imagine he will look weak in the process, much like he did at Wrestlemania.

Match #6
Team Hell No vs. Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns
Tornado Tag Team Match for the WWE Tag Team Title

What SHOULD Happen:...and so it ends. Easily the most entertaining tag team title run since Edge & Christian is out of time. The Shield are certainly very worthy to tag the belts here. This match should be fantastic and will be a strong contender for match of the night. Remember a while back I said that Dean Ambrose should be banned from ringside? Well let’s have a run in by a mysterious newcomer to help The Shield win the title. Later it can be revealed to be Connor O’Brian from NXT, who would be a great addition to this stable.

What WILL Happen: The Shield will win and should come out looking very strong. I wouldn’t be surprised to see Kane and Bryan have some miscommunication to lead to their loss here, possibly with some Ambrose interference.

Impromptu Match/Segment #2

What SHOULD Happen: Antonio Cesaro comes out to complain about not having a match only to get interrupted by Wade Barrett who says that he should complain, since he is Intercontinental Champion after all. The two heels banter for a moment only to be interrupted by a returning Christian! He tells them both to stop boring people and is able to clear the ring. Next month we can have a triple threat match for the IC Title.

What WILL Happen: Surely a Diva’s match of some sort, right?

Match #7
John Cena vs. Ryback
Last Man Standing Match for the WWE Title

What SHOULD Happen: Yet again, the company has booked themselves into a corner here with Ryback. Coming fresh off a hell turn, he really needs a win, but he’s clearly not ready for the WWE Title, especially since Cena just won it. The stipulation gives a perfect out, a double KO. Ryback looks strong, Cena keeps the title, ta-da everyone wins…or at least fails to lose. Next month we can get a four way match with Ryback, Sheamus, and Mark Henry all challenging for the title which could allow Henry and Cena to pair off after.

What WILL Happen: This match is going last for sure and it will end with Cena overcoming his ankle injury and getting the win for sure.

Match #8
Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar
Steel Cage Match

What SHOULD Happen: Here we are, the rematch that nobody asked for…again! The first match at Summerslam was decent, the rematch at Wrestlemania was absolutely boring, so hopefully this one will be somewhere in the middle, at the very least. I don’t understand how Brock Lesnar has been worth it for the company at all, especially since he has gone 1-2 against already established stars. Lesnar needs this win in a bad way, as he clearly can get more mileage than Triple H.

After Lesnar wins he and Heyman should yell out “BEST IN THE WORLD” as the show ends…

What WILL Happen: Lesnar will win on the account of interference, possibly from a returning CM Punk.

For those keeping track the card for WWE Payback in Chicago next month SHOULD include:

WWE Title Match: Cena vs. Henry vs. Sheamus vs. Ryback
World Title Match: Ziggler vs. Del Rio
IC Title Match: Barrett vs. Christian vs. Cesaro
The Shield (including Connor O’Brian) vs. Kofi Kingston, Team Hell No and Randy Orton
Diva’s Title Match: Kaitlyn vs. AJ Lee
Jericho vs. Fandango in a gimmick match
CM Punk calls out Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar (setting up Lesnar-Punk at Summerslam)

May 14

NHL Playoffs: Second Round Predictions That Will No Doubt Be Proven Wrong

Posted on May 14, 2013 by G

No rest for the wicked, eh? A scant 24 hours after two very intriguing Game 7 implosions, we’re back at it with two first round series starting up tonight! Back to offer their thoughts are Glen, Troy and a Coin who all did surprisingly well last round!

In third place is a man who correctly predicted the Penguins, Senators, Bruins, Blackhawks, and Kings advancing, and earns an extra point for correctly calling the Hawks winning in 5, for a total of 6 points is Troy!

Troy Says: That first round was crazy! It was heartbreaking to see my Canadiens lose to an incredibly scrappy and determined Ottawa team….especially since their first goal in game 4 was EXTREMELY obviously kicked in and it completely boggles my mind as to how in the world that was actually allowed to count…..but I digress. It was a mix of fun and sad to watch the Canucks implode once again. Watching the magic that follows the Red Wings continues to amaze. They had an incredible stretch just to make the playoffs and then they defeated a loaded Anaheim team.

Back in the East watching Marc-Andre Fleury pretend to play for the Penguins while obviously being paid off by the Islanders was interesting to say the least. If the Islanders had gotten absolutely any goaltending from Nabokov they could easily be in the second round right now.

In the Boston/Toronto series my heart truly breaks for the Leafs. That was an epic and unmatched collapse. It’s all part of the learning process though. Next year will be different for the Leafs. Same with Montreal and the Islanders. They are young teams trying to get their feet wet and as they say you have to learn to lose before you can learn to win.

In second place is a man who perfectly predicted all four series in the East and called both the Blackhawks and Red Wings advancing. In addition he called the Rangers 7 game win, giving him 7 total points is Glen!

Glen Says: What an unbelievable First Round we saw! For the first time in recent memory, the Eastern Conference was more compelling and entertaining than the West.

We had the Penguins look very beatable, only to resolve things with a goalie switch. Then the Senators and Canadiens had an all-out blood war that featured some of the best quotes of the post-season. The Capitals and Leafs both gave their teams reasons to hope only to completely fall apart in different yet spectacular ways in Game 7.

The second round as a whole looks incredibly promising as we get two Original Six showdowns, a geographic battle, and of course Matt Cooke in Ottawa. Even if most of the series end quickly like they did last year, this still should be a ton of fun.

Last year in the West, everyone was amazed that perennial contenders in Chicago, Detroit, Vancouver, and San Jose all fell in the first round and everyone called it a changing of the guard. Well guess what? A year later and three of those four teams are back in the second round and they are joined by the Stanley Cup Champion – who coincidentally join the ’08 Red Wings and ’09 Penguins as the only champs since 2002 to win a series the next year – needless to say, what’s old is new again out West, and it’s pretty damn exciting!

And somehow or another the Coin was able to predict the Pens, Sens, Rangers, Bruins, Blackhawks, and Sharks to advance and even more astonishing – it called the Sens and Hawks in 5 and the Rangers in 7. Yeah they coin has 9 total points…kill us all.

WESTERN CONFERENCE

#1 CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS vs #7 DETROIT RED WINGS

One more time for the last time

Troy: If you aren’t following @Eklund on Twitter…you should be. He made a point about the Red Wings that is absolutely bang on. They are by far the best coached team in the playoffs. Combine that with the fact that Chicago was not on their game in the first round and this could be a very entertaining series. I think the Wings will be a good test for the Blackhawks and I think it will be the push they need to start firing on all cylinders again. The unknown here is Howard. These teams are close enough that Howard could absolutely steal a game or two so Chicago will be able to take absolutely no short cuts. Even though Chicago wasn’t completely in their game in the first round they still took out Minny in 5 games and their captain, Jonathan Toews did not play anywhere near his capabilities. Toews won’t let that happen two series in a row.

Blackhawks in 6

Glen Says: If anyone is going to beat the Hawks this year, it won’t be the Red Wings. The Wings were lucky enough to matchup against the weakest non-Southeast Division leader in recent memory. As Troy said, the Wings are very well coached, but Babcock simply doesn’t have the horses for this race. The Hawks are just too deep and the Red Wings don’t have Lidstrom anymore. There is a reason that Ryan Sutter played a million minutes in the last round, they wanted him out there against both Kane and Toews. The Red Wings just don’t have a minute muncher anymore to do that. Thankfully there is the Original Six Factor here, because this series will be a ugly.

Blackhawks in 5.

Coin Says: Blackhawks in 5

Expect to Hear: ”How do you feel like playing a few more games?” – Ken Holland talking to his cell phone as he makes a mysterious call to Sweden.

#5 LOS ANGELES KINGS vs #6 SAN JOSE SHARKS

Gamers vs. Chokers

Troy Says: This is a series that pits two teams each having won four straight games. The Kings had a very tough start to their series but then rattled off four wins in a row against a damn good St. Louis team. San Jose however swept a disorganized and pitiful Vancouver team that completely lost themselves. That being said I think this is LA’s series to lose.

Kings in 5

Glen Says: I want to like the Sharks, really I do. I started blogging about sport in 2007, and sending e-mails to Troy for many years before that, and I picked Teal and Black to win or at least make the finals nearly every time. However, after too many disappointments, I just can’t do it. Last round I said that the winner of LA-St. Louis would make the finals, so I better stick with it. Logan Couture, Joe Pavelski, and Anti Niemi will do their best to make a series of it, but the Kings have the experience. Oddly, this is the first time the Kings have had home ice in a playoff series since the first round of the 1992 playoffs. They were undefeated at home against the Blues…

Kings in 6

Coin Says: Kings in 6

Expect to Hear: “We’re part of the Battle of California too” – All 12 Ducks Fans

EASTERN CONFERENCE

#1 PITTSBURGH PENGUINS vs. #7 OTTAWA SENATORS

CSI Ottawa: Staring Eugene Caruso

Troy Says: This is easily the series I am most looking forward to in the second round. I think Ottawa is going to be a really tough opponent for the Pens. Pittsburgh’s goaltending in the first round was horrible. They had to use Vokoun because Fleury couldn’t stop a beach ball. Now look at the other end of the rink and you’ll see Anderson. He played incredibly well against Montreal and was a huge reason why they took out my Habs in 5. Pittsburgh beat the Islanders in 6. But they did it in spite of their goaltending. Ottawa will not be that easy to overcome. Daniel Alfredsson has given his team everything and he’s proven that he still has a lot left in the tank. As Karl Eriksson gets his game back this team is only going to get better. This Ottawa team seems to have a cinderella feel to them and I think the Pens are vulnerable.

Senators in 6

Glen Says: Let’s see, one team rolled over their opponents in 5 games which included two 6-1 curb-stompings. The other had a goaltending controversy despite winning two shutouts, and survived two other overtime scares to win an incredibly close series in 6 games.

If I wrote that as a “future preview” two weeks ago you’d be expect the first sentence to be about the Pens route and the second one to be about the Sens route. Yet somehow or another, things changed and the Senators come in looking like world beaters and the Penguins come in a little shaky.

Honestly, I think that the Islanders poked the dragon here. The Penguins looked very focused in Games 6 and 7 after being tied 2-2 and going with the goalie switch. Expect Tomas Vokun to start this series but be given a short leash. The team just seems to play better in front of him. Now Evgeni Nabokov was pretty bad in the first round, I mean, not Marc-Andre Fleury bad, but pretty terrible. Expect the Penguins to have a much harder time scoring on Craig Anderson. However, Malkin, Iginla and Crosby are 2,4,5 in playoff scoring and people haven’t noticed them, so expect all three to step it up as things keep going.

This series will be fun and the games should be very close, but the Sens just can’t hang with this team that seems to be starting to click on all cylinders.

Penguins in 5 very close games

Coin Says: Senators in 5

Expect to Hear: ”It wasn’t Matt Cooke! It was Colonel Mustard in the Observatory with the Skate Blade” – Eugen Melnyk after finding the results of his forensic investigation

#4 BOSTON BRUINS vs #6 NEW YORK RANGERS

HRR Bonanza!!

Troy Says: Another Original Six matchup! I love it! This one should be very tight. Callahan has been everything for the Rangers and with Lundqvist between the pipes they are going to be extremely tough. Boston is coming off one of the biggest Game 7 comebacks in playoff history (first team to comeback from 3 goals down in the 3rd period of a game 7) so they are certainly going to be emotionally charged. The Rangers are obviously a much different team than the Leafs and they boast much more playoff experience so they will not be a pushover. i honestly don’t have a feel for which team has the advantage in this series. In a series like this is tends to come down to goaltending and New York has the advantage there.

Rangers in 6.

Glen Says: Which team should be more excited about their Game 7 win?

The Rangers looked bad in the first two games of the series but once they got going, they never looked back. Henrik Lundqvist, the best goalie in the world is coming into this series on back-to-back shutouts and they got the win despite Rick Nash and Brad Richards not showing up much on the score sheet. If those two guys can start to play to their level, and if Chris Kreider can recapture some of the playoff magic he had last year, these guys could really make some noise.

The Bruins on the other hand are a curious story. In Games 1,3, and the last few minutes of Game 7 they looked like world beaters, but the rest of the series they looked pretty average. People are, quite rightly, praising the Leafs for hanging with the Bruins, but shouldn’t they also be asking the Bruins why they played down to the Leafs level for so long? How can a team this good be down 4-1 against a team like the Leafs? The Bruins need to figure this out or they will be in trouble. Lucky for them their Marchand-Bergeron-Seguin like finally clicked in the dying minutes of Game 7, hopefully they can keep delivering when their backs aren’t against the wall.

I took the Bruins to make the Conference final at the start of the playoffs, so I better stick with it but I think that this series will be a lot closer than I initially predicted.

Bruins in 7

Coin Says: Rangers in 4

QUICK HITS

Troy Says:

Blackhawks over Kings in 7

Senators over Rangers in 5

Blackhawks over Senators in 6 (If it goes 7, Anderson gets the Conn Smythe no question)

Glen Says:

Kings over Blackhawks in 7

Penguins over Bruins in 6

Penguins over Kings in 6

Coin Says:

Kings over Blackhawks in 5

Rangers over Senators in 7

Rangers over Kings in 5

Judging by the way things went in the first round we better put our money on the Rangers here…

May 01

NHL Playoffs: Eastern Conference First Round Predictions That Will No Doubt Be Proven Wrong

Posted on May 1, 2013 by G

Welcome back to the second set of first round predictions. Here we will look at the Eastern Conference. Will the Penguins dominate as expected or will the big bad Bruins have something to say about it? Both the Rangers and Capitals have been peaking of late, so one of those hot streaks will come to an end. Let’s not forget that the three Eastern Canadian teams are in the playoffs, and we are getting our first all Canadian series since 2004, so that’s pretty exciting!

#1 PITTSBURGH PENGUINS vs. #8 NEW YORK ISLANDERS

The Sidney Crosby Injury Watch

Glen Says: While everyone expects this series to be short, and they are probably right. These games may be closer than some people expect. While the Penguins won the season series 4-1 but three of those wins came in Pittsburgh’s undefeated month of March and they haven’t played since the Islanders really took off in the last month of the season. Expect Tavares to really arrive on the big stage with this series and Evgeni Nabokov to remind people that he was a pretty damn good goalie back in San Jose. Don’t get me wrong, the Isles aren’t taking this to seven or anything, but I expect this to be like the old Dallas-Edmonton series that Dallas would continually win in four or five, but every game would be tight and fun to watch.

Penguins in 5

Troy Says: Well this is basically the Eastern Conference’s version of CHI-MIN. No question Chicago was the best team in the league in the regular season but Pittsburgh was not far behind. Especially when looking at the second half of the season. Don’t forget that Pittsburgh has been without Crosby and Malkin for a while now but they haven’t skipped a beat. It’s been impressive. This is an incredibly deep team and the Islanders simply can’t match. The weakest link in Pittsburgh may be their goaltending. Fleury can sometimes be an enigma. He has the ability to lead a team to Stanley Cup but he can also stink out the joint. Still though, I’m pretty sure I could play goal for the Pens in this series and still win.

Penguins in 4.

Coin Says: Penguins in 5

Expect to Hear: ”The last time the Islanders won a playoff series was against the Penguins in ’93 when Sidney Crosby was 5, Jonathan Tavares was 2. What a coincidence we were all 20 years younger then!”

#2 MONTREAL CANADIENS vs. #7 OTTAWA SENATORS

The Anti-Rivalry-Rivalry

Glen Says: Somehow, someway these two teams have shared a division for over 20 years and have never once played one another in the playoffs. These two teams are the closest geographically of any two Canadian teams yet have absolutely no rivalry to speak. Their fan bases have even bonded over their mutual loathing of the Leafs. Hopefully this series will find a way to kick start a blood feud here. The Sens must be tickled that they not only spoiled a Toronto-Montreal love fest, but they also got their ideal matchup in the first round. The Sens would have been in a lot of trouble against the Bruins or Penguins, but they matchup well against the Habs. Think about it: Subban vs. Karlsson, Anderson vs. Price, The Calder Line vs. Galenchuk and Gallagher, these teams are a lot more even than the standings would indicate. Both teams are even limping their way into the playoffs.

These same Sens took last years Rangers to seven games, and last years Rangers are a much better team than this years Habs.

Senators in 7

Troy Says: This one tears my heart out. The Habs are my favourite team but Ottawa is probably number two. I love seeing an all Canadian series but I hate seeing it in the first round. Seems like such a waste. I’m really looking forward to this series though. It should be incredibly tight. This year I had the chance to go to my very first Habs game and it was against Ottawa (sans Karlsson). Montreal won 4-3 in a shootout and it was a fantastic game. It was probably the most fun I’ve ever had with my pants on. Much like in the West this is a 2 vs 7 series that really doesn’t feel like one. All year long Ottawa’s depth and character has been tested and they’ve come through with flying colours whereas for whatever reason all the success Montreal has had feels odd. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. So far it hasn’t but I can’t shake this feeling that they’re not the team I want them to be. I think Ottawa may expose that.

Ottawa in 6. (Can you believe that??)

Coin Says: Senators in 5

Expect to Hear: ”This is the first playoff meeting of these two teams since 1927. We used to agree that these Senators weren’t the same as the old ones, but since we called that team in Winnipeg the Jets we’re kind of forced to now…”

#3 WASHINGTON CAPITALS vs. #6 NEW YORK RANGERS

Fourth Time in Five Years: Get Ready for Divisional Playoffs Next Year!!!

Glen Says: This series, again? Have two teams met so frequently yet hated one another so little? Last years second round series was the most boring shot-blockingest series I can remember. Thankfully though, Dale Hunter is out and Adam Oates is in, oh and that Russian guy is playing about a thousand times better now than he was a year ago. I think that this will be the closest series taking place and we will see some legitimately amazing games from some truly elite players. The two guys under the most scrutiny will be Rick Nash, to see if he can be on the winning end of a playoff game in his career, and Braden Holtby, to see if he can duplicate his success from last year. I know which of those two I have faith in.

Rangers in 7

Troy Says: The two playoff chockiest teams get to play each other again. This one should be different though. First of all Ovechkin finally got over his love of Ice Dance and decided to start playing hockey again and wow has he been good. I’m not 100% sure on my stats but I think he had 234 goals in the last 15 games of the season. On the other side of the coin New York is an incredibly deep team lead by a Captain who is incredibly tenacious and completely capable of putting this team on his back and willing them to a win. In the last couple seasons Callahan has really begun to impress me. In the end I think Ovechkin is going to drag his team through this round. He’s a sleeping giant who has finally awoken.

Washington in 7

Coin Says: Rangers in 7

Expect to Hear: ”Can you believe that he only scored 6 goals in 7 games? Ovechkin is such a choker. Look at that Brad Richards, he got 4 points in 7 games, he’s so clutch.”

#4 BOSTON BRUINS vs. #5 TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS

Nothing of Interest Here, Nope, Not a Series of Lopsided Trades That Helped Define Both Franchises

Glen Says: This will be an unmitigated slaughter, plain and simple. The Bruins have stumbled a bit to close the season, but let’s not forget: this is essentially the same team that won the Cup two years ago. Sure you can replace Thomas with Raask, Recchi with Jagr, and Kaberle with Redden, but I’ll be damned if those aren’t lateral moves at worst, and more than likely full scale improvements. These guys can and will flip the switch and the Leafs will be in their way.

Even as an abject Leaf hater, it’s hard not to be a little caught up in their stories. Nazem Kadri finally arrives, Reimer plays so well that Luongo is stuck in Vancouver, but this will be a tough one.

Bruins in 4

Troy Says: I would love nothing more than to see Toronto knock off Boston in this series but unfortunately for Leafs fans I just don’t see it happening. Boston is deeper, tougher and bigger. Toronto’s best offensive threat is Kessel and for whatever reason he disappears against his former team. In 22 games against Boston he’s scored 3 goals. None of which were even strength. The plus here for Toronto could be Reimer. He has played very well against Boston of late and if he can outplay Rask he will give his team a chance. In the end I think the Bruins will be too much.

Boston in 6

Coin Says: Boston in 5

Expect to Hear: ”Kessel for Seguin and Hamilton isn’t the only time the Leafs made a bad trade with the Bruins. On November 9, 1954 the Leafs acquired Joe Klukay for Leo Bovin and well we all know how that worked out…”

Quick Hits:

Glen Says:

#1 Pittsburgh Penguins over #7 Ottawa Senators in 6

#4 Boston Bruins over #6 New York Rangers in 6

#1 Pittsburgh Penguins over #4 Boston Bruins in 5

Troy Says:

#1 Pittsburgh Penguins over #7 Ottawa Senators in 5

#4 Boston Bruins over #3 Washington Capitals in 7

#1 Pittsburgh Penguins over #4 Boston Bruins in 7

Coin Says:

#7 Ottawa Senators over #1 Pittsburgh Penguins in 5

#6 New York Rangers over #5 Boston Bruins in 6

#6 New York Rangers over #7 Ottawa Senators in 4

So that means that the Stanley Cup Final will be…

Glen Says: Pittsburgh Penguins over St. Louis Blues in 5

Troy Says: Pittsburgh Penguins over Chicago Blackhawks in 7

Coin Says: New York Rangers over Chicago Blackhawks in 7

…go home coin, you’re drunk!!!

Apr 30

NHL Playoffs: Western Conference First Round Predictions That Will No Doubt Be Proven Wrong

Posted on April 30, 2013 by G

Well it’s the most wonderful time of the year once more!!! That’s right the NHL playoffs are starting up once more! It’s hard not to get in the spirit of excitement especially after thinking that we may not see playoff hockey until 2014. So of course it means one things: baseless predictions! Myself, my hetero-life-mate Troy, and a 2002 Two Dollar Canadian coin I found in a pile will be making predictions for the playoffs. In addition to providing fool-proof (and most certainly wrong) predictions for each series we’ll also provide a simple tag-line to help you remember this series among all the others and a primer for the refrain that you’ll be hearing about this series going forward.

In this post we’re going to look at the left half of the continent as we preview the Western Conference. This year everyone seems to be counting on the Chicago Blackhawks who dominated the regular season, but there are still last years surprise champion Kings waiting in the wings, and let’s not forget rising teams in the Ducks, Wild, and Blues. Of course the Sharks, Cancuks, and Red Wings aren’t dead yet, and could still put up a hell of a fight. The Western Conference has traditionally been very unpredictable, so expect the unexpected…which I guess means that the expected will be unexpected, which you should have been expecting all along!

…alright I gave myself a headache there, let’s get to it.

#1 CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS vs. #8 MINNESOTA WILD

The Midwest Massacre

Glen Says: This will be an absolute curb-stomping. The Blackhawks have been the best team in the league from the opening puck drop. They went half the season without losing in regulation and have been in control of the President’s Trophy since then. The Wild struggled a bit at the start of the season, peaked in the middle, then struggled to close down the stretch, which made them finish in the dreaded 8th seed. Even if the top talent on the Wild play to their potential, they just can’t match the depth of the Hawks. This series should be quick and painful for the state of Minnesota. However, once the Wild’s young talent like Brodin and Granlund actualize in the next few years this could be one of the league’s next great rivalries. But next doesn’t mean today.

Blackhawks in 4

Troy Says: Let’s see….a team that went a billion games in a row without losing a game in regulation versus a team that barely beat the crappiest team in the league on the last day of the season to barely sneak into the playoffs. I don’t think there’s much to talk about with this one folks. This series should basically just be a warm up for the Hawks. Serves Minny right too because they eliminated Columbus who has a goalie with easily the coolest last name ever….Bobrovsky.

For poops and giggles I’ll say the Wild win one game.

Hawks in 5.

Coin Says: Hawks in 5

Expect to Hear: ”Just a reminder, despite not playing in several weeks the Blackhawks are still in the playoffs…”

#2 ANAHEIM DUCKS vs. #7 DETROIT RED WINGS

The Reason for Realignment

Glen Says: The Red Wings must be so thrilled that they not only avoided Chicago in the first round, but also avoided Vancouver, LA, and really any other elite team in the West. The Ducks had a very good regular season but are clearly punching above their weight class with the second seed. Even though they clearly miss the greatest defenseman of the generation they still have some weapons to through out. Expect to see Ryan Getzlaf and Corey Perry wearing red sweaters that vaguely resemble Pavel Datsyuk and Henrik Zetterberg. This will be the Wings last playoff run in the Western Conference and I don’t expect it to end all that quickly. Plus we really need one more Detroit-Chicago series for old times sake

Red Wings in 6

Troy Says: How weird was it coming down the stretch and actually thinking that there was a chance Detroit might not make the playoffs? It’s just a given that they’ll be in. In the end it took a gritty effort from the Wings to pull it together and even still it was Zetterberg who put this team in his back and got the job done. There is no shortage of pure talent on this team but the same can be said of Anaheim. Perry, Getzlaf, Ryan. These guys are good. I’m really not sure which way to go with this series. Even though it’s a 2 vs 7 series it really doesn’t feel like it. Especially after Detroit picked up their socks at the end of the season and really started to play well. My gut though is telling me Anaheim is coming out of this series.

Ducks in 7.

Coin Says: Ducks in 7

Expect to Hear: “Ten years ago the 7th seed Ducks swept the 2nd seed Red Wings and somehow that’s still relevant”

#3 VANCOUVER CANUCKS vs. #6 SAN JOSE SHARKS

Slackers of the World Unite!

Glen Says: This series has all kinds of intrigue as we see the two teams that have been unfairly cast as underachievers for the better part of the past decade. Of course back-to-back Conference final appearances by the Leafs in the 90s was considered a dynasty and fifteen playoff wins for the Oilers and Flames was considered spectacular, but I digress. These two teams both have the world to prove and both coaches are most certainly playing for their jobs here. As with all things Canucks, goaltending is the most interesting facet and should be fascinating to watch playout in this series. Of course Schneider is hurt and Luongo was hung out to dry in the last game of the season. Expect it to be a massive distraction, still though the Canucks have really found their game of late and appear to be healthy and rolling and should win a very close series.

Canucks in 7

Troy Says: This is another tough series to call. Vancouver is not the same team that made it to the cup final in 2012 but San Jose traded two of their toughest players this year at the deadline in Clowe and Murray. They’re going to miss those guys when the puck drops in the playoffs. Although a lot is still expected of the Canucks the expectations are nowhere near as high as in the years leading up to their run in 2011 and I actually think that could benefit them here. It may allow them to play more of their game. If they get the kind of goaltending they need from either Schneider or Luongo then they’ll be a serious threat.

Canucks in 6.

Coin Says: Sharks in 5

Expect to Hear: ”We lost 2-1, it’s clearly Luongo’s fault!”

#4 ST. LOUIS BLUES vs. #5 LOS ANGELES KINGS

Seriously, They Played Last Year…We Promise

Glen Says: I put this as one of the five most intriguing potential series the other day and I stand by it. These teams match up very well against one another. They both have incredible defensemen, a lot of depth up front, options in net, and great coaches that love a defense-first game. In short, these two teams are both made for the playoffs. In my opinion the winner of this will make it out of the Western Conference much to the shock of the Chicago Blackhawks. Since 2003, the Stanley Cup Champions have had a series record of 4-7 with three of those series wins coming from the 2009 Detroit Red Wings, so let’s go with that easy narrative here.

Blues in 7

Troy Says: Hard to count out the defending champs. They’ve already proven they can handle the pressure and that they have what it takes. St. Louis is a team that has been on the rise for a number of years and they’re finally starting to see the fruits of their labour in a strong way. Add into the mix the skills of Jay Bouwmeester who will finally never have to answer questions about never having been in the playoffs and the Blues are a team on the verge of making some noise. As much of a cliché as it is, this series is probably going to come down to goaltending. Last year the Kings shelled Elliot in their series against the Blues but on the other hand there has been a significant drop off in Jonathan Quick’s play as compared to last year so it’s a tough call. Interesting to note that these teams have met three times in the playoffs and each time it’s been a sweep. I’m going to go with my gut again and take LA.

Kings in 7

Coin Says: Blues in 4

Expect to Hear: ”Who will be the this years version of last years Kings? This years Blues or this years Kings?”

QUICK HITS

As a bonus for fun, we’ll try and suss out the next few rounds, mostly so people can say how wrong we were…

Just a reminder that in the NHL second round teams are reseeded, the highest remaining team plays the lowest remaining team.

Glen Says:

#1 Chicago Blackhawks over Detroit Red Wings in 5

#4 St. Louis Blues over #3 Vancouver Canucks in 6

#4 St. Louis Blues over #1 Chicago Blackhawks in 6

Troy Says:

#1 Chicago Blackhawks over #5 Los Angeles Kings in 6

#2 Anaheim Ducks over #3 Vancouver Canucks in 7

#1 Chicago Blackhawks over #2 Anaheim Ducks in 5

Coin Says:

#1 Chicago Blackhawks over #6 San Jose Sharks in 6

#4 St. Louis Blues over #2 Anaheim Ducks in 6

#1 Chicago Blackhawks over #4 St. Louis Blues in 7 (with a 3-0 comeback no less!)

…Troy clearly copied the coin on this one!

Come back tomorrow to see the East. Will anyone stop the Penguins? Are the Capitals finally clicking? What about the All-Canadian matchup that no one asked for. Come back to find out!

Apr 15

Wrestlemania XXX: Imagining What the Card Will Look Like

Posted on April 15, 2013 by G

“We support your local sports team” say the WWE – Photo from Wikimedia

With a very disappointing Wrestlemania XXIX in the books it’s time to look forward to what the big event will look like next year. For the past six years the company has been like Star Trek movies, brilliant showings for the even numbers, and dullsville for the odd ones. Hopefully next year things will continue, as the company is sure to go all out for the event next year in New Orleans.

There have already been rumours of a Brock-Rock showdown and every year there is some talk of Cena-Taker taking place, where would this leave the likes of CM Punk, Triple H, Daniel Bryan, or the star that seems to have been born in Fandango.

So with a little bit of speculation we get the following matches…

Tons of Funk, R-Truth, Santino Marella and Zack Ryder vs. Prime Time Players and 3MB
YouTube Pre-Show Match

This is sort of a thrown together 10 man tag to get people who would pop the crowd on the card. They could all dance around, hit their spots and move on.

Lights, fireworks, GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!!

Chris Jericho and Christian vs. Rhodes Scholars
WWE Tag Team Title Match

Of course this is dependent on Jericho returning, but a reunion run with Christian could be exciting. They could have a nice little run with the tag team titles and have a showdown with two of the best smarmy heels in the business. Hopefully a chance to open the big event is a big apology to the Rhodes Scholars for leaving them off the card like they did. It could be extra fun to get Edge in the corner of the blond Canadians as a nice little nod to the past.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

This match fits the “no idea what to do with these two guys on the card spot”. It’s safe to say that The Miz won’t be a face this time next year, since he’s been pretty flat in this role. He can go on and on about being undefeated at Wrestlemania and drop this match cleanly, possibly foreshadowing another first time loss at this big event…

Antonio Cesaro vs. Wade Barrett vs. Fandango vs. Kofi Kingston
vs. Mark Henry vs. Kane vs. Big E. Langston vs. Justin Gabriel
Money in the Bank Match

The card this year really could have benefitted from bringing Money in the Bank back. It would be a fun match early in the card and it could get some big exposure for the mid-card names like Kingston and Cesaro. Besides the gimmick gets overdone with two a year. They could easily have a different event in July. This match could be hurt by big guys, but it could be fun to see them throw the little guys around. If Gabriel is not over enough they could replace him with a host of other talent, preferably on the face side of things.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio

Every year there is talk of a Cara-Mysterio match, but every year it doesn’t seem to work. Sin Cara does not seem to be working out in the WWE so the company strapped the rocket to Alberto in order to make a new Latin star. With Rey’s body breaking down, this could be a perfect chance to end his career on a high note in a great place. Plus they can finally do the mask record that they want, and have them all be for Rey as a sort of tribute.

Natalya vs. Charlotte
Diva’s Title Match

Charlotte is one of the bright spots in the NXT Divas Division and just so happens to be Ric Flair’s daughter. Natalya is the most talented, yet underutilized member of the Divas on the roster, and she just so happens to be a relative of Bret Hart. Wrestlemania X and XX had certain bursts of nostalgia so it seems reasonable that this could be an easy chance to have something similar happen here. If they had their Hall of Fame family members in their corners it could be pretty epic and actually make the ladies a draw at the big event.

CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler
World Title Match

Wrestlemania XX featured quite possibly the best triple threat match ever for the Big Gold belt contested between three of the top workers of the era. What better way to draw back to that then have three of the top wrestlers compete for the same belt? It doesn’t much matter who is the champ going in but Punk is the most established so we may as well have him as champ going in. We would all be able to sit back and enjoy the show.

Ryback vs. Big Show

The match that was long rumoured to happen at this years event. This match should be a quick squash to put over Ryback as a legit giant. It could be a nice quick cool down after the classic that we would see right before.

The Shield vs. Evolution

Yet another call back to Wrestlemania XX when the young upstarts took on some of the hugest names in the business. Now here is a chance for those former upstarts to be the big names and put over The Shield in a huge way. There have been rumours of a Batista return and this would be a great way to use him and Triple H, plus we could get an interesting dynamic with a potentially heelish Orton. Sure it’s not that different than the six man tag from this year, but it could still be a ton of fun.

The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

This match has been rumoured for a while now and it would be a huge celebrity match with the obvious twist that both celebrities are former WWE Champions. These two had an amazing match and feud in 2002, so they could easily draw on this as being “11 Years in the Making”. Of course The Rock was injured facing Cena, so he may be decapitated wrestling someone as stiff as Lesnar, but that’s a chance I sure am willing to take!

Hall of Fame ceremony featuring Macho Man Randy Savage and Owen Hart!

John Cena vs. The Undertaker
WWE Title vs. Streak

This is the last true dream match featuring WWE superstars, so you know it has to happen at Wrestlemania, somehow, someway. This could be an absolute gold mine for the company if they do it right. The most obvious question would be just how they would handle Taker. Could this be his last match? Would they let him retire as champion? Or could they have him win only for the Money in the Bank winner to cash in the next night or something of that sort. Or heaven forbid they pull the trigger and end The Streak, giving that honour to Cena.

Sure 10 matches was too much this year as they whittled things down to 8 with one week to go. However, if they cancelled the Diddy Concert, took away one of Brock Lesnar’s 700 spine busters to Triple H, and canceled one of the videos hyping the show we were already watching they easily could have fit two more matches in with little problems. They had 10 matches at Wrestlemania XXVI and 11 at XXII, and both of those were fun shows.

Any ideas? Changes?

Apr 07

Wrestlemania XXIX: What SHOULD Happen vs. What WILL Happen

Posted on April 7, 2013 by G

“No More Than 17 Times a Lifetime…We Promise” – The far less popular tagline for this event. Photo from Wikimedia

So here we are the Granddaddy of Them All, The Showcase of the Immortals, the biggest event on the pseudo-sport calendar, Wrestlemania XXIX! The entire wrestling world is waiting with…indifference.

It’s easy to kind of see why the top three bouts feature two recent rematches and one match that seemed to be thrown together a few weeks ago with some offensive material thrown in for fun. But with some examination, this is kind of an interesting microcosm for the entire company.

On one hand we have heavily promoted matches featuring The Undertaker who is in his first match since last year, Triple H in his second match, and The Rock and Brock Lesnar who are both in their third matches since last years big event. Cena and Punk are the only real marquee draws just like last year. Clearly the company needs to build up some new stars.

However on the other hand, it looks like that’s just what they are doing. A remarkable ten wrestlers are in their first Wrestlemania, which is the most since Wrestlemania 2000, which featured a bunch of future World Champions in Edge, Christian, Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit, Eddie Guerrero and Chris Jericho making their Wrestlemania debuts. Who knows in a few years we may be amazed that Ryback, Damien Sandow, and all three members of The Shield all had their first moments here at Wrestlemania XXIX. For all the doom and gloom about the over-reliance on part-timers there is a story to be made about the efforts to make some new big names. So even though this event seems blah now, it may in fact have a pretty big impact on the history of the sport.

Enough with the premable, let’s get to it!

Matches are in the order of what they SHOULD be. The numbers in brackets are the records of these performers at past Wrestlemanias.

YouTube Pre-Show
Wade Barrett (0-1) vs. The Miz (3-0)
Intercontiental Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: Is it possible to say put Cesaro in this match instead? The Miz had a nice little feud going for the US Title which never really got resolved, instead they have him start to feud with the other secondary champion who was feuding with Bo Dallas who hasn’t been seen in forever. Makes sense, right? If they are really serious about The Miz’s face turn, which they should, then he should get the win and Barrett can start a real feud with a real main event player. Plus The Miz is undefeated at Wrestlemania, so why not keep it up? Hopefully they get 10 minutes or so to make it fun.

What WILL Happen: I don’t think that the company cares, someone will flip a coin to determine the winner. Hey The Miz it is!

Match #1
Daniel Bryan (0-1) and Kane (6-8) vs. Dolph Ziggler (1-2) and Big E. Langston (0-0)
Tag Team Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: This is probably the best choice for an opener especially since Del Rio-Swagger will have a weird crowd reaction, Fandango is a wild card, and Ryback-Henry will probably be bad. Three of these four guys have a strong connection with the crowd and there has to be som excitement to see Langston debut, especially on such a huge stage. Hopefully we get a great 15-20 minute match with Ziggler and Bryan controlling most of the action. I think that it’s time for the amazing run of Team Hell No to end, we can have some slight miscommunication leading to the heels winning while the faces go back into therapy to recover from their loss.

What WILL Happen: It certainly won’t be 20 minutes, but this should be a fun match and I imagine Langston will come out looking like a star while Bryan and Kane explode at each other.

Match #2
Ryback (0-0) vs. Mark Henry (1-3)

What SHOULD Happen: Can you believe that Henry has only been in four Wrestlemania matches before this on and only one of those was a one-on-one match, against The Undertaker no less. Ryback makes his Wrestlemania debut and this match is really set up to give him a huge “Wrestlemania Moment”. This match should be short and end up with Henry getting marched around the ring and dropped down for the count.

What WILL Happen: Probably about the same as above, except it may be a little painfully long me thinks.

Match #3
Chris Jericho (4-7) vs. Fandango (0-0)

What SHOULD Happen: If given enough time these two could really deliver a flat out classic. Sure it may seem odd that Jericho came back to get stuck with a rookie, but we have to remember that Jericho gets to pretty much pick his spots. So the fact that Jericho picked the former Johnny Curtis says that he has high hopes for him, so the rookie gets his first big win and hopefully goes on to feud with The Miz over the Intercontinental Title.

What WILL Happen: Fandango will certainly get a win, I imagine there will be some sort of dance related shenanigans before hand.

Match #4
Sheamus (1-1), Randy Orton (4-5), and Big Show (4-8) vs. The Shield (0-0)

What SHOULD Happen: Every match that The Shield has been in has been quite good, and there’s no reason that this shouldn’t be as well, especially with the dysfunctional face team. There have been rumours of an Orton heel turn for a while now, I just hope it doesn’t happen here. There has to be a temptation to put Orton in The Shield, which would really derail the group. We should have Orton and Big Show argue most of the match and almost come to blow before Sheamus pulls them apart. Eventually Sheamus accidentally hits Orton with a Brogue Kick and The Shield go out and win. Over the course of the next few weeks or months the tension builds and we get a nice little Sheamus-Orton feud.

What WILL Happen: Orton turns heel in the match and joins The Shield as their leader.

Diddy Performs

What SHOULD Happen: Right after the song finishes out comes 3MB and thanks Diddy for being their opening act. They start to get in his face and look like they are going to attack him when Kingston and Truth run out to make the save, giving some people in the midcard something to do. Maybe they could even set up a tag team match with Diddy as a corner man at Extreme Rules.

What WILL Happen: He performs, he leaves, not much else happens.

Match #5
Alberto Del Rio (0-1) vs. Jack Swagger (2-0)

What SHOULD Happen: How the mighty have fallen haven’t they? This feud started out hot with some intrigue but has fizzled very quickly, really hurting Del Rio as a face. However, this match really isn’t in doubt is it? You can’t have the racist win the epic showdown, unless it’s Triple H, and it’s ten years ago. Del Rio should win pretty cleanly with an arm-breaker “injuring” Swagger for a convenient 30 days, standing triumphant.

UNTIL….Ziggler and Langston run down deliver a beatdown and we get the first man to ever win two different titles at the same Wrestlemania!

What WILL Happen: Del Rio will win and cleanly, they can’t be that stupid…can they?

Match #6
Triple H (7-9) vs. Brock Lesnar (1-1)
No Holds Barred Match
Triple H Must Retire if he Loses

What SHOULD Happen: The booking here is quite simple. Shawn Michaels hits an errant superkick, and F-5 later and one of the greatest of all time is forced to retire. Shawn and H can both do a special “comeback” next year in both of their last matches for reals.

What WILL Happen: This is probably the hardest match to predict what will happen. On one hand logic dictates HHH gets his win back but on the other hand do they really want their huge signing to go 1-2 in his first year? Especially since Lesnar reportedly resigned for another two years so he’s clearly on the up. Let’s go with the guy who owns the company getting the win.

Match #7
Brodus Clay (0-0), Tensai (1-1), and the Funkadactyls (0-0) vs.
Damien Sandow(0-0), Cody Rhodes (1-2), and the Bellas (0-1)

What SHOULD Happen: The Rhodes Scholars are so above this, let’s have them get the win in the bathroom break match. Let’s have Kaitlyn get invovled somehow since that was a potentially intriguing story that was completely forgotten about.

What WILL Happen: One of the biggest rules of Wrestlemania is: when in doubt, pick the face. So let’s have Team Funk get the win.

Match #8
The Undertaker (Seriously, you don’t know?) vs. CM Punk (3-3)

What SHOULD Happen: As much as I’d love to see Punk go down as The Streak Breaker, it just doesn’t make any sense. He’s going down but damn it’ll be a really fun match.

What WILL Happen: See above, easily the most predictable match we’ll get.

Match #9
The Rock (5-4) vs. John Cena (6-3)
WWE Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: Get comfortable this may take a while…

The two have a back and forth match where Cena just can’t keep The Rock down for three. After a while out comes none other than Paul Heyman who distracts the ref and The Rock when out comes Brock Lesnar who proceeds to F-5 the pants out of The Rock allowing Cena to get the win. In an homage to 12 years ago, he shakes hands with Paul Heyman to end the show.

The next night Heyman kicks Punk out of his crew and Cena and Lesnar deliver a beat down, allowing him to take some time off and return in a few months as a face. This will set up Rock-Brock for next year, Punk-Cena at Summerslam, and probably a lot more.

What WILL Happen: No way we’re seeing a Cena heel turn. He’s clearly getting his win back.

So despite a pretty predicable card on paper, we have some intriguing questions. Will we see Triple H wrestle again? Will The Shield stay strong? Will they finally pull the trigger on Ziggler? How exactly will Cena get his win back?

Mar 08

Imagining How the NHL Will Look in 2015: Part I Canadian Pipe Dreams

Posted on March 8, 2013 by G

The NHLPA has given its approval for the proposed realignment plan for the 2013-14 season yet included the ominous statement “to be re-evaluated following the 2014-15 season”. Obviously this could just be a ploy by Fehr and co. to not let the owners run wild, but more than likely it gives them a chance to try this system out and more importantly, after 2015 a few dominoes should fall, namely relocation and/or expansion.

The Phoenix Coyotes situation has dragged on far longer than anyone would like to admit, sooner or later this team will no doubt have to move with Seattle as the most heavily rumoured destination. Also, don’t forget that there will be a new NHL sized arena in Markham, Ontario ready in 2014 and one in Quebec City the following year, making these two cities very likely destinations for expansion.

Now if we were to get two more teams in Eastern Canada how on earth would that work within the current setup? Obviously with there already being eight teams in both Eastern Conference divisions, it probably wouldn’t work directly, unless we want to put Quebec with the Pacific Division, so it would require some work.

In this post we’ll look at the most likely possibilities to resolve this oddly complex problem that looks like it has a very simple solution yet always seems to cause some problems…

For the purpose of this post, we’ll rechristen the Quebec team the Nordiques and the second Toronto Area team the Legacy since that rumour was floating around for awhile, even if it is a stupid name.

Here’s the first logical, geographical (and therefore least likely) option.

So here we have Detroit and Columbus get booted back to the Western Conference to make room for the two teams gained in Eastern Canada, this makes Colorado have to join the Pacific teams which is easy enough. The Coyotes playing Phoenix or Seattle makes no difference with respect to this option, since either way they’d be in the Pacific Division.

Now here’s the hard part: There is only room for one extra team to join the re-renamed Northeast Division which doesn’t have room for both Florida teams who have to go to the Atlantic where they belong, so the most Northeasternly “Atlantic” team has to move division, and that unfortunately is the Pittsburgh Penguins which takes them away from Philadelphia. The Pens-Flyers rivalry is the entire reason that the Florida Teams are lumped with the Northeast teams, so while this alignment may make the most sense geographically, it’s not the best schedule for Rivalry Night on NBC Sports, with all those Penguins-Nordiques games to show.

So the NHL doesn’t want to upset the Penguins, Flyers, Red Wings, or NBC, so who do they want to upset? Well let’s look at recent history and we can see who they don’t care too much about…

That’s right, those two teams in Florida haven’t suffered enough! This would make the Lightning and Panthers the two Eastern Time Zone teams in the Western Conference team, but it has to be someone, right? Add in the fact that there isn’t that big of a trip to Nashville, Dallas, or even St. Louis and it’s not actually too bad, long trips to Winnipeg notwithstanding.

Both Eastern divisions would be absolute gold mines for the CBC and NBC respectively, it’s hard not to imagine the NHL going ga-ga over this. Now if we care a bit more about geography we could trade Tampa and Florida for Carolina and Columbus, which could make a bit more sense, even if it would be tough on Carolina.

In both of these scenarios, scheduling is not too complex: each teams breakdown would be 32 games against non-Conference opponents (2 against each of the 16 teams, plus 30 in division games (4 against 5 teams and 5 against the other 2 on a rotating basis), plus 20 games against non-division games in your Conference (2 against four of the teams and 3 against the other four). 32+30+20=82.

But why must we be so caught up with the four division paradigm? Remember when the NHL was pushing for four Conferences, well two more Northern teams can give us a really interesting option with that actually…

Here we get a very simple design with a clump of teams in the North, South, East, and West. Sure Columbus is hardly “South” and Colorado is barely “West” but the line has to be drawn somewhere. Both the Southern and Northern Conferences end up with five teams in the Eastern Time Zone and three in the Central, but that’s not too bad. The travel distances are obviously lower in the Eastern Conference, but are pretty equitable everywhere else.

Plus, Detroit gets reunited with Chicago and we get a cool hybrid of the current Northeast Division and the old Norris Division. Sure Toronto and Montreal are split, but they have spent more of their time since the 1967 apart than together anyway.

The biggest concern is the lack of star power teams in the Southern Conference, but who knows what big players will end up on any of those teams. Add in the fact that one of them will be in the “Final Four” every year to build some momentum in some struggling markets.

With this, we’ll go back to the NHL’s four-Conference schedule, each team plays a home-and-home against the 22 non-Conference teams and then the other 38 games against in Conference opponents, six against three teams and five against the other four, bringing things to 82 games nicely.

Now the second option is probably the most likely, but the third one is pretty fun to think about and it sure beats the idea of Quebec being in the Pacific or Boston in the Central,doesn’t it?

Next time we’ll look at a few different options like having teams in Phoenix and Seattle, and just how that will make things look.

Mar 03

Seriously, What’s the Plan for Wrestlemania XXIX?

Posted on March 3, 2013 by G

After watching the WWE product in recent weeks, I can’t help but feel like the WWE has the card written down on a napkin somewhere and it must read something like this:

Cena and Triple H need some big wins back

Undertaker wins if he wants to

Hey let’s make fun of the Tea Party and make a Mexican the Champion

Figure the rest out later

As it stands right now we are five weeks away from Wrestlemania and only two matches are booked. Clearly, Triple H-Lesnar in the rematch nobody asked for will be made official this week, and it’s highly likely that The Undertaker will challenge CM Punk, especially after Punk called himself God last week. That brings us to four matches that should be official by this time next week.

That in and of itself may not sound too bad, there is time to flesh out the card after all of these stories take care of themselves. The problem though, everything else is kind of a mess is it not?

Let’s see we have a multi-month feud between Cesaro and The Miz that seems to have ended only for The Miz to confront The Big Show, only for The Big Show to somehow get involved with The Shield. Speaking of The Shield, they continue their feud with Ryback, Sheamus gets added into the mix and so do Orton and Jericho, but then so does The Big Show. Sheamus, not content to feud with only three men, makes an alliance with Orton to fight The Shield and meanwhile is verbally sparing with Wade Barrett, not over his title but instead over Collin Ferrell. What happened to Bo Dallas by the way? Mark Henry squashes people left, right, and centre with the only The Great Khali standing up to him for some reason. Oh and the most promising surefire main eventer, Dolph Ziggler, loses again and again with no real direction. But hey, at least that’s better than Kofi Kingston who get saved by Truth to maybe set up a reunion for their team as they take on the Rhodes Scholars but that gets forgotten and Cody ends up maybe setting up a relationship with Kaitlyn the Diva’s Champion who really has nothing to do here. The only guys outside the main event with any real direction are the Tag Team Champions who will either finally have a match at the big event or possibly have to defend their titles with their torsos tied behind their backs.

Add in the fact that apparently the company is rumoured to have Sheamus-Barrett and Jericho-Henry on the show and it’s hard not to scratch your head. Sure they started to hint at Sheamus-Barrett last week but Chris Jericho and Mark Henry haven’t been in the same place, outside of the Elimination Chamber, in a pretty damn long time. Sure it would be a fun match, but it doesn’t exactly fit the story.

Pardon the pessimism, but it’s hard to care about the big event when the company clearly doesn’t. Of course the four surefire matches carry some intrigue, and it’s hard not to be excited about the possible Kane-Bryan match, but what about the rest? Wrestlemania is the chance for the future stars of the company to get some big time attention and be able to become main eventers in the future. It sort of boggles the mind.

So let’s say that those two matches do in fact happen, that gives us six matches with a lot of talent not booked, throw in Kane-Bryan and we’re up to seven. We would still need to get The Shield, Ryback, Big Show, Miz, Orton, Cesaro, Rhodes Scholars, Kofi Kingston and R-Truth, and the entire Divas division on the show. To make it worse, in the past several years Wrestlemania has tended to top out at eight matches, while having up to ten once in recent years.

So do they do The Shield vs. Ryback, Orton and Big Show as one match and the ten millionth Cesaro vs. Miz encounter in the other? That seems like the most likely option, maybe to add a mixed tag with Kaitlyn on one side and The Rhodes Scholars on the other, which should bring us up to ten matches to make it look like this:

The Rocks vs. John Cena – WWE Title Match

Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger – World Title Match

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar

The Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Mark Henry vs. Chris Jericho

Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus – Intercontinental Title Match

The Shield vs. Ryback, Randy Orton, and The Big Show

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz – United States Title Match

Rhodes Scholars and Tamina vs. Kofi Kingston, R-Truth and Kaitlyn – **Possibly with the Tag and Divas Titles on the Line

Does that seem like it’s worth the money to you? What about Ziggler?

Feb 17

Elimination Chamber: What SHOULD Happen vs. What WILL Happen

Posted on February 17, 2013 by G

The Least Misleading Poster in WWE History – photo from wikimedia

Welcome back one and all to an irregular feature here at Blade Jobs of Steel. With a major PPV coming up this Sunday, it is time to look at the event from both the critical and prophetic eye that all smarky wrestling fans same to have. We will look at the event and examine what (probably) will happen according to current WWE logic and trends and compare it to what, in our humblest of opinions, should happen.

Here we are at our annual Speed Bump on the Road to Wrestlemania. In recent years this event is occasionally a predictable place holder and occasionally a complete curve ball. Anyone else remember 2009 when Edge lost one title and won another in the same night, completely screwing up everyone’s fantasy card? How about in 2011 when no titles changed hands and the man who everyone thought would win the Rumble went out and won the right to challenge for the top title anyway?

As usual this event could land somewhere on this spectrum. Will we get the path set for Rock-Cena II, or will they get things set up for a Triple Threat match? What about the rest of the card? There is not a ton of direction for the World Title at the moment, so expect to see something come up soon.

Enough with the preamble, let’s get right down to it!

The card order will be in the order of what SHOULD happen, with some discussions as to what will happen along the way.

YouTube Pre-Show
Rhodes Scholars vs. Brodus Clay and Tensai

What SHOULD Happen: Why is this match happening? They really could have used some build here, especially since both members of Rhodes Scholars were squashed on TV this week for no real reason. Clay and Tensai are clearly the flavour of the month for the WWE and do have some potential as a fun comedy/monster team going forward. However, there is a ton of money in the Rhodes Scholars so they should get a win by nefarious means.

What WILL Happen: The Hip Hop Hippos are clearly going to win and dance here and nobody will remember this match in the future.

Match #1
Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz
United States Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: The outcome of this match really depends on what the companies plan is for Jack Swagger of all people. Swagger, especially with his current gimmick, is tailor made for an extended run with the US Title and The Miz could be a perfect transitional champion. If they company wants Swagger to win the belt at Wrestlemania then Cesaro needs to drop the gold here. However as was stated in our most recent Wrestlemania card predictions, we have that happening next month, so let’s have Cesaro retain possibly by being disqualified or counted out.

What WILL Happen: The Miz has been struggling in recent weeks so expect Cesaro to keep the gold here, maybe even moving on to a new program for Wrestlemania.

Impromptu Match/Segment #1

What SHOULD Happen: Wade Barrett vs. Kofi Kingston for the Intercontinental Title —With all due respect to Kofi, he kind of doesn’t matter here. The important thing is that Barrett gets a match against someone who is not Bo Dallas and Kingston and Sin Cara are the biggest faces not already booked so they are the most credible opponents. Barrett needs a good title defense and then a post-match confrontation with Bo Dallas afterwords.

What WILL Happen: Wade Barrett vs. Bo Dallas for the Intercontinental Title — It wouldn’t be at all surprising if they book this match to happen so soon and with so little hype. Hopefully Barrett retains for now.

Match #2
Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show
World Heavyweight Title Match

What SHOULD Happen: Not sure if this is interesting or sad that they go from having the final match be a straight-up encounter after having two gimmick matches to start the feud. Has that ever happened before?

These two have had some very compelling matches and there’s no reason to think that this will be any different. Since we predicted a fatal four-way for the big gold belt at Wrestlemania let’s have the match end in a no-contest when both guys are down and Ziggler and Langston run in and deliver a beat down before Ziggler cashes in and leaves the night with the Big Gold Belt.

What WILL Happen: Ziggler has to cash in, doesn’t he? This means that he probably won’t. Let’s have Del Rio winning with some Guerrero level trickery while Ziggler runs down to cash in but Alberto somehow escapes before the match starts.

Match #3
John Cena, Ryback, and Sheamus vs. The Shield
Six Man Tag Team Match

What SHOULD Happen: How awesome would a Cena heel turn here be? Man that would be all kinds of brilliant, sadly though – that ain’t happening. The next best thing we can hope for is to have The Shield win either by Brad Maddox crockery or by some new debuting member of The Shield like Connor O’Brian or Cassius Ohno.

What WILL Happen: The Super Team will stand triumphant with Cena getting the fall and The Shield will need to regroup a bit. As a slight aside, I wonder if the WWE will have Ryback and Sheamus have some sort of a miscommunication which would lead to a Wrestlemania match. Please say this doesn’t happen, these two should be having a Title Match at next year’s Wrestlemania, so leave them apart for now.

Match #4
Kaitlyn vs. Tamina
Diva’s Title Match

***This is copy/pasted from last month when this match was rumoured to take place…move on***

What SHOULD Happen: No way Kaitlyn loses the title so soon after winning it. Get used to this match since there are no other Diva’s on the roster to challenge for the title right now.

What WILL Happen: Same as above.

Impromptu Match/Segment #2

What SHOULD Happen: Rhodes Scholars have a segment with Booker T, the team agrees that “Due to popular demand” they will reunite and demand a tag title shot after their huge win in the pre-show. Booker denies them and they storm out only for Cody to bump into Goldust who mocks his brother and gets beaten down two on one….yeah I really want that tag match to happen!!!

What WILL Happen: Uhhhh….The Rock gets a big promo and makes sure to talk about Cena as well, clearly looking past Punk.

Match #5
Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry vs. Jack Swagger vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kane
Elimination Chamber Match

What SHOULD Happen: As stated in the Wrestlemania card, I really think that a four way match for the World Title is the best option, so Jericho winning here to further his feud with Dolph Ziggler makes a ton of sense. Let’s have Bryan and Kane start in the ring and argue before each of them tries to steal a pinfall. Orton can come out next and hold his own against those two while tensions mount with Team Hell No before Swagger comes out fourth. Finally Bryan and Kane snap at each other allowing Orton to RKO Bryan and Swagger to lock the ankle lock on Kane, eliminating them both. Swagger and Orton fight before Jericho comes out and then finally out comes Henry who goes on a tear, eliminating Orton cleanly, then pinning Swagger before Jericho is able to pull out a lucky win – ta da!

What WILL Happen: This is probably the hardest important match to predict in recent memory. Clearly Kane and Bryan aren’t winning the match, but a strong case can be made for the other four! Orton is the top star of the bunch and would be the biggest draw at the top of the card at Wrestlemania, Jericho has a bunch of momentum on his side and a history with Ziggler, Henry would make a great opponent for Del Rio since he clearly works well against monster, while Swagger has the most long term potential and his “Real American” gimmick makes him tailor made to feud with Del Rio. If Ziggler doesn’t cash in, then let’s go with a Mark Henry win. A feud between Henry and Del Rio would be interesting and it’s not like the secondary world title will add too many buyrates.

Match #6
The Rock vs. CM Punk
WWE Title Match
The Rock loses the Title on a Countout or Disqualification

What SHOULD Happen: How great would it be if The Shield run down and attack Punk, giving him the win by disqualification? As unlikely as it is to happen, what the hell, let’s do it that way. This is my column damnit and I want a Triple Threat match at Wrestlemania!

What WILL Happen: The Shield or Brad Maddox will come down and tease the spot stated above but Cena will make the save, The Rock will win and the show ends with a Rock-Cena staredown.

Let’s see what actually happens!!

Feb 14

Wrestlemania XXIX: Another Idiot’s View of How the Card is Shaping Up

Posted on February 14, 2013 by G

Apparently they build stadiums on state borders… – photo courtesy of Wikimedia

Now that the Rumble is in the past and the Elimination Chamber is just a bit ahead it’s becoming that time when we start to get really hyped up for Wrestlemania! It seems like Rock and Cena are set to do battle, but what about everyone else on the roster? CM Punk has to fit somewhere, and so does Dolph Ziggler and his briefcase. Add in the fact that the WWE has debuted a lot of talent in the past year and the usual part-timers like Undertaker and Triple H need a seat at the table and we could have ourselves a packed card.

The last few years we’ve had eight matches on the big card but that included the ridiculous 14 man GM battle last year. Unless we get a huge match we may see the number of matches climb, so like our look ahead back in November — wait, we had The Shield facing those shmucks? — we have 10 matches on the docket and it includes a few multi-man affairs, but nothing as crowded as last year.

29 Man Last Chance Battle Royal

YouTube Pre-Show

Yes, this is a copy-paste from last time, but it just makes sense. The winner of this Battle Royal gets a spot on the main card as the final member of the multi-man Intercontinental Title Match that we’ll talk about in a few paragraphs. Let’s have the winner be Bo Dallas to further his underdog story.

Fireworks! Explosions! God Bless America!

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Who is the Tag Team Champions?
Special Guest Referee: Dr. Shelby

After spending the past few months building up the Tag Team Division, the company sure has torn it down, haven’t they? The Rhodes Scholars go the way of Kingston and Truth, Rey and Cara are MIA, The Shield are focused elsewhere, and every other team is treated like a joke. The money is in a singles match between these two and it would be kind of fun to have them do a match to determine the Tag Team Champions, sure it was lame when WCW did it 15 years ago, but so was everything in WCW then. Plus if both men find a partner they could feud for the title for a few months afterwards.

Wade Barrett vs. Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth vs. Jack Swagger vs.
Christian vs. Mark Henry vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Sin Cara

Gauntlet Match for the Intercontinental Title

Apparently the company is considering making the Intercontinental Title the focus of Main Event and what better way to kick that off than to give it some focus on the big show? Instead of just doing a ladder match, which nobody would be opposed to, we could do a gauntlet match or something else like that. We could have Dallas pin Barrett and then he himself loses so we can transition the title away from that feud. We could also get a tease of Rey-Cara, which the company has put the nix on apparently. I’d have either Mark Henry or Christian get the big win here, but any one of them would be fine choices for champion.

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz
Flag Match for the United States Title

These two have a decent feud going and hopefully they can have them last until the big event to give us a good mid-card Wrestlemania moment. Making it a Flag Match seems like a logical blow-off to Cesaro being an anti-American US Champion so let’s go with that. Once The Miz wins he can transition the title to the pro-American heel Jack Swagger in a few months while Cesaro moves up to the top talent and works his way to hold one of the top titles within a year.

Ryback, Sheamus, Randy Orton, and Kofi Kingston vs. Brad Maddox and The Shield
Eight Man No DQ Match

I know that this isn’t that different than the match going on this Sunday, but hopefully The Shield can stay strong at the Elimination Chamber. Not to give too much away for the SHOULD vs. WOULD this weekend, but the match is totally set up to have a new member of The Shield, either Brad Maddox or a new guy like Conor O’Brian. As much as we would all love a War Games match, let’s settle for a No DQ Match where Ryback can finally get his comeuppance on The Shield.

Kaityln vs. Tamina
Lumberjill Match for the Diva’s Title

There needs to be at least on Diva’s match on the card so let’s go with the only two that anyone can name. We need a cooler match, especially after what should be a huge, crazy war. Let’s get this out of the way and maybe they can finally bring some of those talented women in NXT after Wrestlemania.

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar

We all know that this is going to happen, maybe there will be some sort of stipulation related to Paul Heyman taking control of the company attached in here. Either way, we can only hope that Lesnar goes 2-0 against Triple H here.

Wrestlemania Dance-Off!!!
Featuring Brodus Clay, Tensai, Fandango, Santino Marella, Zack Ryder, 3MB, and a few legends

Ok this isn’t a match, but it could be pretty entertaining and a decent cool-down segment after that last big match and before the other three huge matches on the card.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Chris Jericho vs. The Big Show
World Title Match

More spoilers for the COULD vs. WOULD but a multi-man match for the Big Gold Belt could just be in the cards. A simple Ziggler cash in coupled with a Jericho Chamber win could set up this very fun encounter. All four men deserve high profile matches and this is a great way to merge the two storylines and feuds. The ground work was already laid on Main Event this week as Alberto had a confrontation with Jericho and then a match with Ziggler. Hopefully Ziggler can walk in and out of Wrestlemania with the belt to look like a world beater.

BookDust vs. Rhodes Scholars

Sure the Rhodes Scholars “broke up” but we could get a great reunion match especially after the great Cody-Goldust segment in the Rumble and Cody calling out Booker T last week, we could get this as a short, fun comedy/nostalgia match.

The Undertaker vs. CM Punk

This match has been rumoured for a few months now and it could be an absolute classic. With the other two high profile matches being reruns, this could get some great fresh eyes on the product. Of course The Streak should continue, but this could be highly compelling.

The Rock vs. John Cena
WWE Title Match

This match is happening, we all know it. Their encounter last year was a ton of fun, and the rematch should have some added heat to it. As entertaining as a triple threat with Punk would be, this is where we are almost certainly heading so we may as well enjoy it.

Obviously the card is subject to change in the next month and a half.

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